Adversity


March 29, 2020

 “There is more to us than we know.  If we can be made to see it, perhaps for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less.” – Kurt Hahn

On my “social distancing” morning walk a few days ago, it occurred to me that because of the creative power of our spoken WORDS, what we repeat ALOUD often manifests very literally. For example:

Moms: “I wish I could spend more time with my kids.”

Teachers: “I wish the school year would hurry up and end.”

Harried workers: “I wish I didn’t have to go in to work today.”

Me: “I wish Disneyland wasn’t so crowded!”

LOL, right?  We got what we wished for, just not in the way we thought.  (And NO, I don’t think individual requests like these can cause a global pandemic!)

Nevertheless, our habitually repeated words CAN become reality for us individually – for good and for not so good.  That’s because the subconscious mind is always listening to what we SAY and it takes everything very literally.  Therefore, it’s always a good idea to think carefully before you speak because by the creative power of your words, “thoughts become things” in your world.

The method and timing (the “How”) for delivering what we ask for, I believe, originates with God/The Universe. If what you ask for isn’t in alignment with your highest good, God/The Universe will block it. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t get something you want.  Believe that it wasn’t the best thing for you and God/The Universe is going to direct you to something even better.

But if your heartfelt desire IS good for you and doesn’t harm anyone else, you can trust that the Divine Plan for manifesting what you ASK for will make sure it comes to you at the perfect time, in the perfect way. Your subconscious mind is like a receiving dish that channels the Divine Mind’s messages into your conscious mind in the form of an unexplained urge to go somewhere or do something, an inventive, inspired thought or a deeply buried memory that suddenly surfaces. If you pay attention and ACT on those Divine nudges, they will lead you to the ideal “How” to fulfill your desire.

This past week, I had a very unexpected “How” manifest one of my own Big Goals. I want to share it with you, in hopes it will remind you to actively, daily use the unlimited power of your creative WORDS, in partnership with God/The Universe and your subconscious mind, to manifest everything you want and need.

For the past two months, I have been writing a letter to God first thing each morning, asking for my husband’s real estate and my coaching businesses to grow and flourish, and then reading the letter ALOUD with a feeling of gratitude. The key to the effectiveness of this method of manifesting — which comes straight from The Gratitude Formula, by May McCarthy — is expressing gratitude IN ADVANCE, which convinces your subconscious mind that it is already a done deal for you.

I first journal and then declare OUT LOUD, “Dear God, I am so grateful that on or before March 31, 2020, I have eight or more new or returning coaching clients and my business is prospering.  We have all the money we need to cover all our expenses, wants and desires.”

Reading ALOUD the gratitude statement for what you want plants it deeply into your subconscious mind and sets the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) to work on your behalf, attracting the right people, resources, breaks and inspiration to you. Then, as the book teaches, you simply wait and pay attention for God/The Universe to send you a “lead” (or leads) that could turn into the “How,” once you ACT on them.

By mid-March, I was delighted that, by following each “lead” I got, I had easily connected to six new or returning clients. Those six were a huge gift, and I was very grateful.  But then things stalled, as people were understandably reluctant to make financial commitments with so much uncertainty about the economy right now.  Each prospective new client would say, “As soon as this crazy time is over, I will definitely coach with you.”

Recently, I got a letter from Joel Osteen Ministries, requesting a financial donation to help them reach their March 31 fiscal year-end goal so they could continue their good work of giving hope to people around the world.  (Interesting, isn’t it, that his financial deadline was the same as mine for manifesting the last two clients I wanted?)

Over the past several years, I have gotten SO much clarity and belief from watching Joel Osteen’s uplifting messages, which always remind me that with God’s help, ANYTHING is possible, no matter how far-fetched the goal might seem. I have made a few small donations in the past and really wanted to send him a bigger “thank you,” but now didn’t seem like the right time.  Yet, over several days, the thought kept coming into my mind at odd moments to “Send Joel Osteen $100.”

Try as I might, I just couldn’t seem to throw away the donation card and envelope.  I looked at it every day, thinking, “I am so grateful to Joel for his positive messages. Nobody has helped me more to stay in faith and expect that God’s will for me is GOOD, especially in these scary times.  But I don’t see how I can make that size donation, with the lower income I am expecting over the next few months.”

Finally, the “inner urge” was so strong, I spontaneously wrote his ministry a check for $100 and dropped it in the mailbox before I could get cold feet. It made no sense to my rational mind, but that strong inner urge was prodding me, and I thought it just might be one of God’s “leads” to bring me what I needed. Almost instantly, a sense of peace came over me, convincing me that somehow my gift was going to lead to something good for me, too.

A few days later, out of the blue, I got an email from PayPal, stating that they had “pro-actively” decided to NOT deduct a business loan pay-back amount from my account for at least the next 30 days – representing almost $1,000 worth of income I wouldn’t need to cover the loan payback.  I had received back about 10 times what I had given in faith that it would somehow be covered!  In this perfect example of a “lead” straight out of The Gratitude Formula playbook, I got an “urge” and I followed it in faith, even when I didn’t know exactly what it meant.

As it turned out, that was just the beginning of my generous payback for following Divine instructions!  I got another “lead” from a business article that said many creditors are now helping their customers the way PayPal had.  So, I decided to reach out and ASK two other creditors and they instantly agreed to suspend all payments through June, with no interest penalty and no effect on my credit scores.  Altogether, I will save $2,000 each month through June, which means that I won’t need as much income as I had thought to cover my bills. The answer to my need wasn’t what my conscious mind had figured out. Instead, God/The Universe answered my Gratitude-in-Advance request in a much different way, but the outcome was just as good.

Even more importantly, this manifestation proved to me once and for all that The Gratitude Formula really does work.  If we ASK our Spiritual Source OUT LOUD for what we want, believing and feeling grateful, like it’s already done, then WAIT patiently for Divine directions to come to us for the “How”, our heartfelt desires WILL manifest.

I hope you will follow your inner urges and sudden inspirations. They are undoubtedly your subconscious mind trying to make you pay attention to what a much BIGGER Mind wants to guide you to, which is MORE than you dreamed was possible!

IMPORTANT NOTES: The blog will take next Sunday off and return with a new Cup of Caroll on Sunday April 12.  In the meantime, stay safe and healthy and expect The Best!

Also, if you haven’t yet checked out Leslie Zann’s Facebook Live Outrageous Achievement series, you really must!  She gives her unique input to help us design our new lives in “home stay” mode.  It will lift your spirits and give you great ideas for prospering during this challenging time. Her 15-30 minute live presentations on mindset, skill set, viewpoint, courage and open mic are all at 7:00am Monday-Friday for five weeks at www.facebook.com/lesliezannconsulting. (Of course, if you are not an early riser, you can watch the recordings later, as well.)

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

March 22, 2020

“Sometimes good things fall apart, so better things can fall together.” – Jessica Howell

I don’t have to tell you what times are like right now – crazy, challenging, depressing, nerve-wracking, scary.  Not to mention, having the kids home from school indefinitely driving you to consider having a Mommy Martini for lunch.

We are all in uncharted territory.  Nobody living today (in North America or Europe, at least) has been through a pandemic like the novel corona virus. What can any of us do to help heal this overwhelming situation?

You can do a lot.  Collective consciousness is a real thing.  (Definition: “A set of shared beliefs, ideas, and moral attitudes which operate as a unifying force within society….a shared understanding of social norms.”) Right now, the collective consciousness is causing toilet paper shortages for no good reason.  But it can also produce beneficial effects, such as making most of us voluntarily obey “social distancing” for the collective good and step up to help our neighbors find toilet paper. Our collective thoughts and emotions can either create more problems or make a dire situation more bearable.

We know that the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) says that the thoughts and emotions YOU individually put out into the world are going to attract similar people, situations, resources, etc. to you. That’s why selfishness, fear, anger, resentment, blame are NOT energies you want to embody, for your own sake.   Instead, as the Bible puts it in Proverbs 11:25, “The one who blesses others is abundantly blessed.  Those who help others are helped.” You can’t out-give God, as they say.

Still, it’s very understandable if you are feeling depressed or upset these days, because many aspects of this situation affect us and our loved ones directly, yet are beyond our control. In truth, we have more control than we think.  What we think and what we focus on will not only impact how our own situation unfolds, but as part of the collective consciousness, will impact other people we may never have any direct contact with.

The other day, I emailed a friend of mine to check on him. He is going through a really tough time right now. He just lost his job (to which he will not be rehired). He now faces the daunting task of finding a new job in the midst of the worst job market since the Great Depression. He replied that he feels dejected, numb, and wonders if he should just give up his search and hunker down alone in his apartment for the coming weeks or months.

I understood his state of mind, but as a coach, I couldn’t just commiserate.  I care about him too much not to remind him of what I absolutely KNOW to be true: He needs to take control of his own energy and start turning it toward the positive NOW, if he wants to survive this.  I reminded him that, when he was in another very difficult circumstance years ago, I challenged him to make a GRATITUDE LIST of at least 25 things he was grateful for right then.  To my amazement, he was able to list 100 things and people he was GRATEFUL for!

This time, I suggested he sit down at his kitchen table and not get up again until he listed at least 50.  He hasn’t yet sent me his list, but I fully expect it will be well over 50 again.  That’s because once you turn your thoughts from what you DON’T WANT to what is POSITIVE instead, you must quickly recognize that there is so much more GOOD than bad in your life. He has a roof over his head and unemployment insurance, which will keep it there.  He has friends and family who care about him and will help him if he just asks.  If he feels isolated, he has a phone and computer to reach out to them.

Another coaching client of mine came up with the “Three Gs” you can use to pull yourself out of negative energy quicksand. The Three Gs are:

  • Gratitude – Focusing on all the good you have in your life right now.
  • Giving – The fastest way to lift your own spirits is to lift someone else’s.
  • God – Praying, trusting, believing in a Higher Power who cares about you.

If we all focus our thoughts and our actions in those three areas, I know that we WILL turn this ship around. We will not just survive as a society, but we can come out stronger and better than before.  In fact, many social media posts are listing a lot of positives that have come out of this situation already, including a much cleaner environment and non-existent traffic, home-bound workers finally getting more exercise and more sleep, families re-connecting and a greater sense of community, as we discover the joy of helping our neighbors in ways big and small.

I also believe that our society will have some lasting beneficial changes from this awful pandemic, depending on what we decide to do after it passes. It can be the impetus to finally implement good ideas that we have kicked around for a long time now, such as an AFFORDABLE mainstream college education for all who want one that is entirely online. We are mastering using existing technology to get remote health care that keeps patients and medical staff safe from catching something in the doctor’s office.

And, hopefully, a lot of businesses that have been reluctant to let staff work remotely will finally see that they really CAN be productive at home. That could be a solution to the huge childcare problem parents face when their children are sick or too young to go to school or it is just unaffordable.  Once we have test-driven these “new normal” ideas for several months, it will be hard to go back to the old ways that don’t work for so many people.

IMPORTANT INVITATION

If you could use some real positivity in your life right now, I urge you to join me in plugging into the F.R.E.E. new Outrageous Achievement series my friend and mentor Leslie Zann is doing five days a week for the next five weeks on Facebook Live.

For those of you who don’t know her, Leslie has been an inspiring speaker and masterful trainer for over 25 years.  It was Leslie who first introduced me to the importance of having a daily personal development practice as a foundation for success, which set me on the path to becoming a Personal Success Coach.

Leslie’s Facebook Live series begins this Monday, March 23 at 7AM Pacific (times vary by day Monday – Friday).  She will offer insights – both emotional and professional – in her usual “Leslie style” (fun and candid!).  These brief 15 -30 minute segments will focus on helping you develop the Mindset, Skillset and Viewpoint necessary to maneuver through our new normal with grace and courage.

I am honored that she has invited me to speak on one of the segments!  I will keep you posted on which date that will be.

I urge you to listen to as many of these wonderful daily doses of positivity as you can.  This is for EVERYONE – we are all in this together! Check out her facebook page for all the details: www.facebook.com/lesliezannconsulting

Go here for more details and sign up for a daily email reminder: http://bit.ly/ZannLive

March 15, 2020

“Trust yourself.  Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life.  Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.” – Golda Meir

It’s been a helluva few weeks, right?  Don’t worry, I am going to resist writing about viruses and empty store shelves.

What I am going to discuss is the other hot topic du jour — politics.  WAIT!  Before you run screaming from the room, rest assured it is really NOT about politics.  It’s about a person who just happens to be a politician and his recent experience that serves as proof of something we ALL need to believe in right now: That we can bounce back from ANY type of adversity.  Quickly.  Very quickly.

It’s true.  It can happen almost instantaneously.  But the catalyst must be there.  That’s what I want us all to recognize, because it applies to ALL of us.

I am talking about the Comeback Kid, Joe Biden.  Full disclosure: I happen to be a registered Democrat and Joe was not my first (or second or third) choice to be the Democratic nominee to challenge Donald Trump.  But whatever ultimately happens in the 2020 presidential election, according to political scholars, Joe Biden will go down in the history books as experiencing THE fastest, most unforeseen reversal of fortune of anyone running for president in US history.

When the race started eons ago, Biden came out of the gate as the instant front-runner.  But as the candidate field grew crowded and more and more of his debate performances seemed lackluster, his ratings began to slip, until he was way behind in polling among most of the Democratic candidates.  Soon, the other candidates seemed to dismiss him as a non-threat and focus their attacks on each other. You could see his bewilderment: What happened? What did I do wrong?

Haven’t we all felt blindsided and victimized by circumstances that seem out of our control? Why does my supervisor seem to have it in for me?  Why are my customers dropping off?  Why did the person I love betray me? What did I do to deserve this?!

By the time he had lost three state primaries in a row, in a distant fourth or fifth position, most of the pundits and press seemed to dismiss Joe, too.  It was said that South Carolina, the fourth primary on February 29, had to be his “firewall,” meaning it would keep him on life support for a little while longer until Unbeatable Bernie Sanders could establish an insurmountable lead over all the other Democratic candidates.

I remember one reporter asking Biden two days before the South Carolina primary, “What will you do if you lose?”  I think that question was the turning point….the moment where everything began to change for Biden.

Joe paused for a few beats, apparently taken aback by the condescending question that was on everyone’s mind but his.  Refusing to buy into the reporter’s proposed worst-case scenario, Joe declared, “I am going to win.” I didn’t think he sounded 100% confident, and I am sure the reporter thought, “Poor deluded guy,” but at least he said it.  He declared VICTORY in the face of seemingly certain defeat.  In the face of others’ doubt and derision, he claimed the prize he wanted.

Within hours, an influential leader of the African American community in South Carolina who had long respected Biden as a capable and supportive part of President Obama’s administration, endorsed him.  And on the Saturday election day, Joe won in a landslide.

Even though it was just one state, it was a pivotal victory. With incontrovertible proof of his overwhelming support from an essential segment of Democratic voters, the other moderate Democratic candidates quickly realized they could not individually stop Bernie Sanders. But if they all suspended their own campaigns and endorsed Biden, they could swing a lot of votes his way on Super Tuesday.

One by one, they quickly did just that and over a single weekend out of a whole year of campaigning, Joe went from being a Has-Been to “Joe-mentum.”  Since then, he’s romped to victory in more than a dozen contests nationwide, effectively wrapping up the nomination. Unlike Biden, Sanders has indicated that he accepts his numeric fate.  He just wants to hang in there long enough to have his say in the last two head-to-head debates, hoping to influence Biden’s positions.

What caused Joe’s miracle turnaround? I assert the catalyst was his BELIEF. Not losing faith when all outer evidence indicated his dream was hopeless. Believing in himself.  Believing in his dream. The Bible says that you don’t have to have HUGE faith to move mountains.  You just have to have faith the size of a tiny mustard seed.  Your Belief Energy is enough to start the ball rolling and then God/The Universe will take over and ANYTHING can happen.

Whatever challenging, frightening, negative situation you may find yourself in right now, no matter how hopeless it may seem, if you steadfastly refuse to give up on yourself and your dream and continue to believe, know that the situation CAN turn around quickly, in unforeseen ways.

When you radiate Belief Energy, the Law of Attraction, which says that “energy attracts like energy,” will work in your favor.  You will attract like-minded people who believe in you and will go to bat for you.  You will attract the right resources you need to prevail. (In Joe’s case, a huge amount of new donor funding quickly poured in and Mike Bloomberg even offered the use of his offices and staff that had been running his own campaign).

Never forget this lesson: Just one touch of favor can change your outcome. One endorsement can change your future.

Many of my coaching clients and I are facing some financial challenges at the moment.  And the whole world is facing one big hairy survival challenge together right now.  What can we do?

Of course, we have to take ACTION ourselves and do all that we know how to do.  But even more than the actions we take, we must BELIEVE in ourselves and in our access to  supernatural assistance.  Whether you call it God, the Universe or something else, we must believe that there is a powerful, positive, unlimited Force in charge of everything that has our backs and wants us to succeed.

But we are the catalyst: We have to believe, trust and dare to DECLARE that we WILL triumph.  So much can change so FAST if we do!

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

February 23, 2020

“Believe in yourself!  Have faith in your abilities!  Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy.” – Norman Vincent Peale

Today’s blog is a repost of a blog from two years ago, and I think it’s a good companion piece to last week’s blog (Be Your Own True Love – Blog 363). It takes that message of loving yourself to the next level.

This is a simple, straightforward message that my clients need to hear, I need to hear, and I’m sure every one of my readers needs to hear at some point in their lives: Quit worrying about what others think of you and your Big Goal and just go after it.

Only two opinions matter – Yours and God’s.  One of those beings created you and put those desires in your heart. (The word “desire” actually means “of the Father” in Latin).  The other one is YOU, the only being who has complete free will to pursue those desires or let them die.

If you want your desires to become your reality, your only option is to “Just Do It” with everything you’ve got.  You must shut out your well-meaning friends’ and family’s opinions about how you should live your life.  They don’t have to live with the consequences of you dying with your dreams unborn….YOU do. They don’t have to take the risks….YOU do.  They won’t reap the sweet rewards of your success…. YOU will!

Here’s another great perspective from my favorite tele-minister, Joel Osteen. The remarkable success of the mega church he and his wife Victoria lead in Houston has been the focus of some armchair critics who probably have never built anything in their lives.  Yet, thousands and thousands of people flock there every week and millions more watch on television to hear his messages of faith, hope and positivity, urging them to pursue their biggest dreams.

“Beyond Critical Voices

Anytime you set out to do something great in life, there will be critics.  If you’re going to be a great business person, coach, student, leader or employee, there will be opposition.  The more success you have, the more opportunities there will be for distractions. The higher you go, the more haters will come out.  When you start stretching to a new level and pursuing what God has placed in your heart, the jealous people, the critical people, and the small-minded people come out of the woodwork and start making negative comments but you don’t have to let that distract you.

If you are under pressure today, if the critical voices are coming against you, know that it’s because you are making a difference.  Don’t let them throw you off course.  Instead, dig your heels in, set your face like a flint and say, ‘I will not get distracted.  I will not get drawn into battles that don’t matter.  It doesn’t matter what others think; it matters what God thinks!’

Today, look beyond the critics.  Stand strong in adversity.  Press forward to what lies ahead and win the prize of life that He has prepared for you!”

Scale that wall… Just. Do. It.

IMPORTANT NOTE: The blog is taking the next two Sundays off so I can focus on preparing my webinar on the New Success Formula 2020 (and, of course, taxes). Look for the next brand-new edition of A Cup of Caroll on Sunday March 15.

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.

November 17, 2019

“Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude.  Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness.  Thankfulness may consist of merely words.  Gratitude is shown in acts.” – Henri Fredric Amiel

For many of my clients and me, 2019 has been a challenging year. Our personal challenges may be related to career, finances, politics, health, family relationships, the loss of a loved one, or just coping with the helpless feeling from almost-daily news of yet another violent, senseless slaughter of innocents or lives upended by natural disasters.

Fortunately, the season of “gratitude,” “peace” and “goodwill” is now upon us, when most people make an extra effort to be kind and generous toward their fellow humans.  Maybe one day, this season of goodwill will last all year long, but for now, we will take what we can get!

For the past several years, from Thanksgiving through the end of the year, I have used this blog to invite my wonderful readers to make life a little brighter, happier and easier for others with a “Pay-It-Forward Challenge.” I hope that YOU will participate this year, too!  I love hearing about the many creative ways my readers find to help someone else, show them that they matter to you, or simply brighten their day and put a smile on their face.

I got the idea for this annual Pay It Forward Challenge when I was at Starbucks during Thanksgiving week several years ago. A stranger ahead of me paid $5.00 toward my purchase, which turned my frazzled, grumpy day around and put a smile on my face that never went away through the rest of the year.  That simple act of generous kindness inspired me to buy a bunch of $5.00 gift cards and begin giving them out every few days to the baristas at the register to bestow on random people in the line behind me.

I unexpectedly got to repeat that joyful practice again last week.  I noticed a young man sitting across from us, plugging his cell phone charger into the wall socket.  He had a pile of things covered by his jacket on the seat next to him.  His clothes weren’t dirty, but his hair looked like it hadn’t been washed in some time.  Despite his own troubles, when a small child was acting out in a way that undoubtedly annoyed some patrons, he just grinned at her, revealing a number of missing teeth.  I admired his kind understanding toward a young girl having a meltdown over something she wanted her mom to buy her.

When he stepped outside for a smoke, I quickly went to the register and bought my first pack of $5 Starbucks gift cards to kick off my own annual Pay it Forward Challenge. I was able to prop one against his cup and quickly exit before he saw me.  It made me smile to imagine his surprise that a stranger would give him a little day-brightening gift. I felt great for the rest of the day.

I plan to purchase more gift cards and give them away randomly at Starbucks through the end of the year, and I trust that most of those surprised strangers will also pay it forward to make someone else feel special and cared about. Last year, the baristas told me that there were a number of customers doing the same thing, creating a big old warm chain of goodwill and gratitude, one cup at a time!

You can experience the joy of spreading around some “Holiday Spirit” in your own creative ways.  Your kindness and thoughtfulness don’t have to cost anything.  Here are few examples my readers came up with in years past:

  • Let someone who appears to be in a hurry go ahead of you in the checkout line. I promise they will beam at you!
  • Help a harried friend or colleague run an errand, or babysit their kids while they do.
  • Surprise your friends, family and clients with a snail-mailed or emailed Thanksgiving card this year! Few people think to send them, but this gesture says, “I am so grateful for you!” to friends and customers like nothing else can.
  • Or pick a morning as soon as you arrive at work, to send out an individual email to one or more of your closest colleagues that says what you appreciate about them and why you are grateful to have them on your team. This will make their day.
  • Use your musical, baking or crafting talents to spread cheer and delight to children, neighbors, elderly folks and the sick.
  • Help an older person or someone who is under the weather put up their holiday decorations or haul home their Christmas tree, or offer to do some service to lighten their load, such as mowing their lawn, bringing them dinner or running an errand.
  • Donate some lightly-used warm clothing or blankets to an organization that serves the homeless or low-income families.
  • Donate food, towels, blankets or pet supplies to an organization that helps loving pets that are patiently waiting for their forever homes.
  • Surprise someone who lives alone with a tin of tea and a plate of homemade holiday treats. Better yet, sit down and listen to them while you enjoy the goodies together.
  • Donate blood! One of my clients recently showed up to donate and the nurse asked if she would stay an extra 2 hours to give plasma, which was desperately needed by three children waiting for it.  It interfered with the plans she had for her day, but it also made her day.

If you are able, pay your own financial blessings forward by spreading the prosperity around a bit.  Here are just a few ideas:

  • Surprise a friend on a tight budget with a supermarket gift card that will make their Holiday feast much brighter.
  • At the gas station, if you notice someone in an old car with kids in the back, surprise her by paying for a full tank of gas.
  • Astonish a homeless person by handing them $5 or $10 instead of spare change.
  • Contribute a little extra to your favorite charity or cause. I like to support grassroots animal rescue organizations that are operating on a shoestring. $25 means far more to them than it does to the big animal welfare organizations, although I try to donate as much as I can to those, too.
  • Take the opportunity to donate to the Red Cross, Salvation Army and other relief organizations that are struggling to fill the needs of millions whose lives have been upended by natural disasters or homelessness.

It’s easy to fall into despair and think “What difference can I make in the face of all that seems so wrong and tragic in the world?”  But as this week’s quote reminds us, we can demonstrate sincere gratitude for our many blessings through small acts of kindness toward others.  And if each of us makes it our mission to touch just ONE life in this way, we can start a tidal way of Gratitude, Kindness and Giving that just might spread a little joyous Holiday Spirit far beyond the end of this year.

Please email me your own Pay It Forward Challenge story to caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com!  I will collect them and share them in a future blog to inspire others to do more of the same. 

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top. 

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

October 6, 2019

“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” – Dale Carnegie

I got a huge reader response to the last blog (Use Your Superpower – Blog 350) about ways you can control your own MINDSET in dealing with negative people and situations that we all face from time to time.

The message essentially was: When you maintain a positive energy and do the right thing, the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) will work on your behalf to produce a positive outcome for you and everyone involved, no matter how difficult a situation may appear to be.  Even people who seem permanently locked into negative patterns can change their thoughts and behavior when YOU change your thinking and expectations about them.

This past week, two coaching clients shared their personal examples of this phenomenon, which I now pass along to you, in hopes their experiences will inspire you to use YOUR Superpower too.

The first client has an ailing mother who has required a lot of care from my client and her siblings.  The sister who lives farthest away has not helped share the burden of Mom’s care, either physically, emotionally or financially, and my client was feeling resigned and resentful that there seemed to be nothing she could do about it.

But when she decided to work on her OWN attitude toward her sister, things “miraculously” changed.  My client consciously held positive thoughts towards and expressed gratitude for her sister, wishing her only the BEST.  Soon, her sister surprised the family with a visit and spent a lot of time with their mother, which delighted Mom. She also pitched in with her care, so her siblings could take a much-needed break. What amazed my client most was that there was only positive energy among all the siblings while they were under the same roof.  “They usually butt heads, but there was no conflict, only harmony, while she was here.  I was amazed,” said my client. “I put on a positive mindset and it made a difference.” 

The second client posted a picture on social media of herself with friends at a joyful gathering, which garnered many positive comments. But she was blindsided by a harshly critical message from her own mother about her choice of wardrobe.  This was typical of how her mother has criticized her since childhood about any detail of her life that wasn’t in alignment with her mother’s rigid opinions of “right” and “wrong.”

My client took some time to think before she replied.  She resisted her Ego’s first inclination to lash out after feeling attacked.  Instead of choosing to feel hurt, offended and defensive, she worked on trying to understand her mother’s motivation. Regardless of how bluntly her mother delivered her criticisms, she knew deep down that her mother only intended to help her be successful and well-regarded by society.

When she replied, my client simply thanked her mother for caring about her and always wanting what is best for her.

Then it was her mother’s turn to be caught off guard!  She wrote back that she was surprised and very pleased at how “maturely” and “graciously” her daughter had received the “feedback.” This is the hidden blessing that my client discovered wrapped inside of this negative incident: She knows that her mother may never change, but she will never again allow herself to feel “less than” when her mother shares her personal opinions with her.

As my clients so wonderfully demonstrated, your mindset and energy (your thoughts plus the emotions those thoughts conjure up) constitute a very powerful force – a SUPERPOWER, in fact!  We are all born with it….We just have to consciously choose to use it for our benefit and the benefit of everyone whose paths we cross.

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next week off for some Fall fun in Apple Country!  A Cup of Caroll will re-appear in your inbox on Sunday October 20. 

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com TODAY!

 

September 22, 2019

This week’s blog is a lightly-edited re-post from two years ago.  I recognized the same theme coming up again among my clients, so I thought this would be a good time to remind ourselves that we each have our own Superpower — our MINDSET – that we can use to create success and joy that nobody and nothing can ever steal from us.

“When you see yourself as calm, positive, truthful and possessed of high character, you behave with greater strength.  Other people respect you more.  You feel in control of yourself and the situation.” – Brian Tracy

This week’s coaching brought a blog theme to the forefront of my mind, as several of my clients struggled to deal with negative people without letting it destroy their own positive mindset.

One client was unsure how to respond to a Leader in her network marketing organization who was spewing negative texts to her and other members of her Team about someone who had reached a milestone reward in the company.  She felt it was unfair that someone who had been in the business for a shorter time was receiving this recognition and reward ahead of her. The Leader tried to make someone else’s triumph mean that SHE was never going to get there herself.

Another client was very hurt by a dear friend who texted her after a social event they attended together that she wished my client would “dial it back” about discussing her business with others in a social setting.

And a third client was exhausted from caring for a sick relative who seemed unwilling to take personal responsibility for her own decisions and actions that were contributing to her health problems.

At some time, we all must deal with people whose energy is negative, selfish, uncaring or even purposely hurtful.  If we allow it, their negative thoughts and actions can throw us off course in pursuing our dreams by making us doubt our own positive expectations, values and beliefs.

It’s not in their power to steal your success and joy, but it is in YOUR power — if you choose to surrender to their negativity.  That’s because the Law of Attraction says that energy attracts like energy.”  Toxic people and negative circumstances will come into your life, but it isn’t these outside forces that can harm you.  It is solely your reaction to them that either empowers or disempowers you and determines who and what is attracted into your life next.

In the first client’s case, she handled the toxic texting beautifully with a positive response of her own that said essentially, “I know you are going to reach [that same prize] soon!  Keep up the great work.”  Responding with cheerful positivity is great way to respond to someone else’s negativity.  If you respond with positivity and don’t take the bait, they will eventually stop sending gossip and negative messages your way because it’s no “fun” when others won’t join in the trash talk.  Similarly, when someone comes at you with anger, if you respond calmly and don’t fight back, their angry energy will eventually deflate because it takes two to quarrel.

This is not to say that you should be a doormat or allow someone to mistreat you.  I absolutely believe in standing up for yourself and for what you believe is right.  It’s the emotional energy behind your response that will have a positive or negative impact on YOU.  If you take it personally and allow yourself to go negative, “the terrorists win” because you have given away your power to think and behave the way YOU choose to.

In the case of the friend’s “dial it back” text that hurt my client, I tried to help her see the situation from her friend’s point of view. It takes maturity and self-confidence to consider another’s point of view, especially when it is diametrically opposed to our own.  Judging or being self-righteous toward others’ opinions, beliefs or lifestyle is a form of negative energy.

I invited my client to consider that her friend probably felt awkward in a social setting, standing on the periphery of a two-party conversation for 10 or 15 minutes, as my client politely fielded a barrage of questions from a stranger who wanted details about a product she was interested in. The friend didn’t express herself as well as she could have, for sure.  But I don’t believe she was really being unsupportive of my client’s business; she likely just felt left out and overlooked and it hurt her feelings.

I had a lot of sympathy for the client with the difficult relative.  Anyone who has ever had the responsibility for caring for a sick loved one knows how emotionally and physically stressful it can be.  And when that person is a needy, stubborn, chronic complainer who creates problems that others have to clean up, it can be extra frustrating.

In truth, though, more than the actual caregiving, it was my client’s attitude toward her recuperating relative’s lifestyle that was wearing her out.  For example, she allowed herself to feel helpless and upset that the woman struggled out to the porch multiple times a day to smoke, even though she knew it was bad for her.  I suggested that my client allow the relative to be herself, make her own decisions, and live with the consequences.  She is not required to solve all her problems for her.  She must be compassionate and give her relative whatever support she feels she can, without feeling frustrated or guilty about whatever she can’t control.  Her relative is an adult, after all.  It’s HER life and her own life lessons that she must learn.

The irony is that the recuperating relative seemed to be getting along just fine, while my client was feeling exhausted and unfocused, which was taking a toll on her OWN health, productivity and family relationships.  You cannot control anyone else, and in trying to, you can lose control of who YOU are, thinking and behaving like someone you don’t want to be. The solution is to stop trying to save others from themselves, judging them or controlling them.  Just relax, be neutral and don’t volunteer to be sucked into their life drama.

I love Brian Tracy’s powerful quote.  Let it be your guiding star in determining your own life course. You can ask yourself daily: Am I feeling calm, positive, truthful and possessed of high character”?  Am I acting “strong and in control”? If not, adjust your thoughts and actions until you can answer “Yes.”  Then you will be your own Superhero!

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next week off and will return on Sunday, October 6.

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! *******************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com TODAY!

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