Prosperity


September 17, 2017

“The moment you speak something – good or bad – you give birth to it as an idea, an expectation, a desire.  You have planted the seed that will, sooner or later, grow into the results you will reap.” – Julie David-Colan and Lee J. Colan

In last week’s blog, I described HOW I got the idea of teaching Jen Sincero’s great new book, You Are a Bad Ass at Making Money, as a summer tele-course to help my clients and their network marketing Teams (and any of my blog readers who were interested, too!) to overcome summer inertia and reach their Big Goals in record time. I shared with you that the first characteristic of a Big How is that it often comes to you out of the blue in a surprising form.

All of my clients were excited about the summer course idea and it also seemed like a perfect How for ME because I needed another income stream to get me through the tough time of year when many of my private coaching clients would “take a break” for a month or two. It was a Big How because it was clearly a Win-Win solution to the summer slump for both my clients and me!

Big How Characteristic #2:  It often starts out as a small idea, but soon, the details start to take shape and then you realize that you must then ACT on them.

UH OH! As I was speaking my summer course idea into existence and getting enthusiastic responses, my clients’ questions made me realize that there were a LOT of details that must be handled efficiently for the course to be ready in a few short weeks. I made a long To-Do list, which turned out to be just the beginning of the Big, Fat Summer Adventure that 52 participants and I were about to embark on.

Fortunately, as Jen Sincero promises, “The Universe will always send you what you need.  It wants you to succeed, to grow and blossom and shine.”

After I set the dates and began promoting “Prosperity Summer Camp” in my weekly blog, The Universe gave me one simple idea that proved to be a HUGE shortcut to success:  I phoned my friend and mentor, Leslie Zann. She is an expert trainer for the direct sales/network marketing industry whose sage advice saved me lots of time and possible mistakes regarding the number of sessions, how much to charge, how to handle the registration and payment details and what platform to use for delivery. But in order to follow Leslie’s wise counsel, I had to face the next characteristic of a Big How.

Big How Characteristic #3: FEAR!  Jen says, “Your role is to keep your mindset strong, open and ready to receive.  And to do a whole lotta stuff you’ve never done before.  Especially stuff that scares the living crap out of you and hurls you outside your comfort zone….When it comes to changing your life, if you’re not scared, you’re doing something wrong.” 

Boy, is Jen right! All of Leslie’s advice seemed fairly easy to follow except one important piece. When I told her that I planned to use my old familiar voice-only tele-seminar format, Leslie exclaimed, “Oh, no! You MUST use Zoom!” Technology, it seems, has advanced a bit since I did my last group course several years ago.  Now, most of my clients use video chatting for their Team gatherings and trainings.

Gulp!  Video conferencing was definitely outside of my wheelhouse. My Big Fears about using Zoom were two-fold:

  • I am used to looking at my notes while I speak on the phone. I asked Leslie how I could do that on video and still maintain eye contact with my audience. “Just put your notes on the desk in front of you,” she assured me. “You can glance down from time to time. No problem.”  I was not wholly convinced that I could pull that off smoothly.
  • But an even bigger concern – OK, FEAR – was that I do not generally find technology to be easy to use. I was worried that Zoom might be too complicated for me to master in a few short weeks. Leslie assured me that Zoom’s tech support is great.  She said I could ask them anything and have them walk me through it.  That turned out to be her BEST advice of all.  A couple of nice young tech reps at Zoom and I are now Besties.

Like most fears that threaten to stop us from allowing the perfect Big How to lead us to a Big Goal, mine turned out to be mere Limiting Beliefs. After a few practice sessions, I mastered all the basic Zoom controls needed to manage and record my presentations. If I had remained in my safe little tele-seminar cocoon, I am sure most of the course participants would have been bored silly.  As it was, even my private coaching clients who took the course said it was great to finally SEE me and assured me that I did fine, both with Zoom AND my eye contact.

Which brings us to the final characteristic of an effective Big How, which I learned while creating and delivering the Prosperity Summer Camp course:

Big How Characteristic #4: It is far BETTER than any answer that we would have come up with ourselves, because it makes us GROW, while getting us to our Big Goal.  The initial tiny spark that began my long journey to spending my entire summer delivering a webinar on the Law of Attraction was my sincere desire to help my clients stay on track pursuing their Big Goals AND an irresistible, burning desire to share with everyone I possibly could Jen Sincero’s amazing book that can teach them how to create the unlimited prosperity and success each of us deserves. And before I knew it, step-by-step, the Big How began to take shape.

If I had let my Limiting Beliefs and fears stop me from using the perfect delivery method that God/The Universe sent me, 52 participants and I would never have gained the invaluable knowledge and had the personal breakthroughs we all experienced.

I asked each participant to email me the outcome of the Big Goal they were trying to manifest by the end of the course.  A number said they were amazed that they actually DID reach their goals – or nearly so — in six short weeks, and that their Big Hows were as surprising and delightful as my own.

Even those who did not reach their Big Goal by August 31 said they were grateful for their major personal breakthroughs – especially in overcoming fears and Limiting Beliefs and giving up their attachment to their OWN limited hows. Yes, Jen, we DID “succeed, grow, blossom and shine!”

As it turned out, the REAL gold in our Big, Fat Summer Adventure together was the growth spurt in our BELIEF. As Jen Sincero says, “Faith is the rocket that you ride into uncharted territory to get to your wildest dreams….You must believe that everything you desire really is available to you and that you possess all the tools, power, and permission to manifest it.” 

Amen, Jen! Amen.

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to http://practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate.  If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.” – Elizabeth Gilbert

When several of my coaching clients told me they were reading You Are a Bad Ass at Making Money by Jen Sincero and vowed that it was EVEN better than her fabulous You Are a Bad Ass, I immediately ordered a copy. I am SO glad I did!

My autographed copy arrived just in time for me to devour most of it on our long flights to and from Hawaii last month. I am urging you now: RUN, don’t walk, to get this book….IF you are interested in having more financial prosperity in your life.  In fact, if you are interested in having more of ANYTHING in your life.

Really, the only thing I can come up with that doesn’t require money is LOVE. So, if we are honest, what concerns us most is how to create more MONEY in our lives because money is the foundation for having time freedom, dream homes, beautiful cars, the best educational opportunities for our kids, creative pursuits, exciting travel adventures and the ability to fully support our favorite charities and causes.

I truly have not been so impressed with a book about the Law of Attraction (which states that “energy attracts like energy”) since The Power by Rhonda Byrne years ago.  Sincero’s new book is so clear, so easy to understand, and so damn FUNNY, I promise that you will turn the pages quickly and laugh out loud frequently, as I did — and then decide to go back and re-read it and do every exercise in the book.

I have been studying, teaching and striving to fully LIVE the formula for using the power of your mind and energy to create anything you want since I was first introduced to it via the network marketing industry in the mid-1990’s.  They didn’t call it “The Law of Attraction” back then (credit for that goes to Rhonda Byrne and The Secret), but authors have been trying to explain how to use it to make your dreams a reality for several centuries. (Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill was one of the first, and still one of the best, modern books on this topic.)

I have gotten many useful insights and ideas from these scores of books and videos by Master Manifesters over the years, which I have put into practice in my own life.  I have used The Law of Attraction to dig our family out of a deep financial hole from the Great Recession, to find the perfect car, the perfect home and the perfect husband (Yes, Rick, you ARE perfect!).  I have used it to create magical vacation experiences and to survive serious threats to our financial and physical well- being.  I know it is real and I know it works.  Reliably, every time.

I got one very useful NEW insight about the Law of Attraction from Jen Sincero’s latest book (which is filled with jaw-dropping and often funny stories of her and her coaching clients’ triumphs at creating large amounts of money when it looked like they didn’t have a prayer of doing so) about the fact that FEAR is always going to be a factor in manifesting what you want.

If you are pursuing the HOW that is going to get you the money or item you really, really want, you have to realize that you MUST experience some discomfort or even cold sweat FEAR in order to get it.  That doesn’t mean that the How contains a REAL risk to your physical well-being.  It usually indicates that your Ego is terrified that you will either fail and will then be ridiculed or devastated emotionally OR that you will succeed and be overwhelmed by your new power and responsibilities or disliked by those who are jealous of your success.

The FEAR can stop you from having your greatest desire when it is right at your fingertips.  You have to WANT it so much and BELIEVE that you are going to get it so deeply that you are willing to walk through all fear or discomfort and come out the other side.  If you are willing to face your fear and do it anyway, you have a great shot at success.

Jen is great at telling it like it is. I love that she doesn’t sugar-coat this because I know that my own Ego and my coaching clients’ Egos have threatened to sabotage us by trying to convince us that the “risk” is REAL and we should STOP NOW in our pursuit of our Big Dreams. (These fears are called “Limiting Beliefs” for a reason!)  If you follow the steps of the Law of Attraction and if your belief is stronger than your Ego’s fear, I know that it WILL work for you. Reliably, every time.

My own most recent Law of Attraction manifestation experience happened last week:  While Rick and I were out delivering his monthly newsletter to each door in his real estate “farm,” I declared to God/The Universe that, “I am creating that Rick will get at least one new real estate transaction from this newsletter.”  I really BELIEVED it and felt EXCITED to see how God/The Universe would make it happen. (Two musts for using the Law of Attraction to manifest what you want, according to Sincero’s book.)

The following day, which was Memorial Day, Rick and I entered a local restaurant and caught sight of our favorite server in the main dining room. We hadn’t seen “Marie” in quite a few months because she only works weekdays and we usually go there for brunch on Sunday. Also, we arrived at the end of the lunch rush, which was usually the time she went home, so it was a lovely surprise to see her still there. We asked to be seated in her section and Rick ran back to the car to get one of his newsletters, as Marie always likes to guess Rick’s monthly “trivia quiz” for a chance at a gift card.

At first, Marie frowned at the hostess, clearly indicating that she was about to end her shift and didn’t really want any new customers.  But when she saw it was us, she beamed and came rushing over to our table, exclaiming, “This is a sign from the Universe that you are here!”  As Rick handed her his newsletter, she told him that she has finally decided to take action on her longtime dream of selling her condo and moving to Idaho, where her retired father (and co-owner of her condo) now lives.

“I have been torn between using you or my dear friend ‘Linda’ to list my house for sale.  She and I have been friends for years, but she is new to real estate and Dad is urging me to use someone more experienced.  Now, here you are, and I take that as my sign it’s supposed to be YOU!” 

And with that, Rick secured his next client.  It was not exactly the HOW I had envisioned, but that is something Jen Sincero emphasizes we have to give up.  We can’t control HOW God/The Universe chooses to fulfill our desires.  Our job is to be CLEAR about what we want, to BELIEVE it will happen, and to take committed ACTION toward our goals– which inevitably means we have to walk through our fear and do it anyway!

So I have decided to step through one of my own big fears and declare this:  I am offering anyone who reads my blog and their friends, colleagues and loved ones the chance to attend a virtual Law of Attraction Summer Camp that I am creating for July and August.

You send your kids to summer camp to help them stay actively engaged, learn new skills, gain confidence, have fun and make new friends. Why shouldn’t we adults use our summer to do the same AND learn exactly how to manifest anything we want – especially money!

I am offering you and your friends the chance to learn exactly how to do this, as I have been doing in my own life and teaching my coaching clients to do for many years now. We will all read You Are a Bad Ass at Making Money together during the two month course, to get the wonderful foundation in Law of Attraction principles that Jen Sincero provides. During the six one-hour classes, I will teach you even MORE practical applications of her precepts.  I will share with you my very BEST tools, tips and techniques that I have used for over 20 years to “make the Law of Attraction my bitch,” as Jen Sincero would say.  I will do group coaching as part of each session AND hold at least one private phone coaching session with each participant, all included in the very affordable course fee.

The scary part for me?  For the first time ever, I am going to present via a Zoom webinar.  (Participants who don’t want to use Zoom for free can still use the telephone to access the seminar.) Tele-seminars have been my familiar, comfortable format up to now.  And learning new technology is not my strong suit….So this is uncharted territory for me.  I am both scared and excited to stretch and grow my presentation and group coaching skills to make the class as engaging and participatory as possible because I want everyone to actually REACH a Big Goal they have set by the end of the two months (whether financial or otherwise).

If you want to learn to manifest your dreams more easily – reliably, every time – I hope you will join me at a Summer Camp for your wallet!  Let’s support each other to put something at stake for the course, walk through our fears, and prove that we can each manifest a Big Goal by the end of summer 2017!

Stay tuned for more details about the course and how to register in a separate email that will come to you soon.  I hope you will forward it to others and help me spread the word to everyone you know who wants their life to be MORE fulfilling, MORE prosperous, MORE joyful and MORE fun!

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at http://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to give a friend, colleague or loved one a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no obligation and no strings attached!  You can give this to as many people who will really appreciate it as you wish.  (If you haven’t been in coaching with me for a while, feel free to claim it for YOURSELF, too!)

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help them clarify their Big Goals and get into ACTION to make this their BEST year yet, have them contact me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com  or toll free 888-503-8145 to schedule their session.   

 

“Be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud.” – Maya Angelou

 It’s that special time of the year — time to give thanks for all the good we have been blessed with.  As Thanksgiving fast approaches in the USA, I want to share one simple way for you to make this a truly joyful time, regardless of your present circumstances.

I hope 2016 has been a wonderful year so far for you and yours, as it has been for my family — a year of fulfillment, abundance, adventure and opportunity. But perhaps it hasn’t been so wonderful, as you may have experienced profound loss, a health challenge, financial deprivation or worry that someone you love is grappling with a serious illness or addiction.  My family experienced a very painful loss with the death of our beloved canine companion, Samantha, who passed away in October at age 16.

Whatever you are experiencing, I am confident that you know you are still profoundly blessed. Just living in Western Civilization affords us personal freedoms, security, comfort and economic opportunity far beyond what much of humanity enjoys. Simply having four walls and a roof, potable water, indoor plumbing, electricity and food in the refrigerator makes us look like royalty to billions of people who share our planet.

Longtime readers will recall that last year I created a Pay-It-Forward Challenge and invited all to participate. It was such an inspiration to hear from you about the many creative ways you found to help someone else, show them that they are important to you, or simply brighten their day and put a smile on their face. 

Rhonda Byrne, author of The Secret, also wrote a book called The Magic, which asserts that GRATITUDE is the most powerful positive emotion we can feel.  Being grateful for whatever you have now puts the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) into action to attract MORE of what you love to you. This book shares many, many ways to rev up your capacity for gratitude and thus attract more good into your life.

But there is a step beyond simply feeling grateful that can make your life overflow with abundance. Putting your gratitude into ACTION demonstrates your commitment and faith that unlimited good is on its way to you from God/The Universe. And Thanksgiving provides the perfect time to go beyond simply saying a special grace at the table. However big or small your current resources, you can actively DO something to bless someone, which will inevitably bless you as well.

Last year during Thanksgiving week, a stranger unexpectedly made my day by paying $5.00 toward my purchase at Starbucks.  It turned my frazzled morning around and put a smile on my face that lasted throughout the day. That simple kindness inspired me to buy a bunch of $5.00 gift cards and begin giving them out every few days to the baristas at the register to distribute to random people in line behind me. It felt even better when it was anonymous.  In fact, it felt so good that I kept it up throughout the rest of the Holidays! 

I can’t wait to repeat this joyful practice again from Thanksgiving through the end of this year. I trust that each of those surprised strangers will also pay it forward to make someone else feel special and cared about. Just think! One $5.00 gift card could create an endless chain of joy and gratitude, one cup at a time!

Your Pay-It-Forward contribution to others’ joy doesn’t have to be expensive. In fact, it doesn’t have to involve money at all. Here are just a few examples:

  • Today, the stranger with a full cart made me smile by letting me go ahead of him in the long checkout line at the supermarket.
  • I took two hours out of my Veterans Day holiday to help a sick friend run errands when she was too weak to drive herself. I enjoyed helping her more than I would have enjoyed the leisure time.
  • Many of my coaching clients are sending Thanksgiving cards this week to surprise their customers and business partners with a heartfelt expression of gratitude for their friendship and support.
  • My friend and fellow-coach, Bob Perks, uses his considerable musical talent to brighten local events as a free singer and DJ. He also prepares and shares meals with his fellow veterans at his American Legion post whenever he can.
  • You could help an older friend or someone who is under the weather to put up their holiday decorations or haul home their Christmas tree.
  • Cover for a colleague at work or babysit someone’s kids while they do their shopping.
  • Donate lightly-used warm clothing to an organization that helps the homeless.
  • Surprise an elderly neighbor with a tin of tea and a plate of homemade holiday treats. Better yet, sit down and listen to them while you enjoy the goodies together.
  • Adopt a pet from your local rescue organization or shelter. If you are not prepared for a lifetime commitment, foster a pet until it can be adopted.

We have been blessed this year financially, too.  If that is also the case with you, I hope you will generously spread the prosperity around a bit. Here are just a few ideas:

  • Surprise a friend on a tight budget with a supermarket gift card that will make their Thanksgiving, Christmas or Hanukkah feast so much brighter.
  • Contribute a little extra to your favorite charity and make a difference for a cause you care about. I love animals, and I especially like to support local rescue organizations that operate on a shoestring, so they can spread their resources further in my community. $25 means far more to them than it does to the big animal welfare organizations, although I try to donate as much as I can to them, too.
  • When you are at the gas station, if you notice someone in an old car with kids in the back, surprise her by paying for a tank of gas.
  • Astonish a homeless person by handing them $10 or $20 instead of spare change.

So here’s my Thanksgiving/Holidays Pay It Forward Challenge for YOU: Take one small, specific action to demonstrate your profound GRATITUDE for all your many blessings. I promise you the joy it gives you will be PRICELESSPlease let me know what you did and I will share all those wonderful ideas in my upcoming blogs.

 PLEASE NOTE: A Cup of Caroll will be taking next weekend off to spend time with my friends and family.  I wish you and yours a joyous and delicious Thanksgiving and look forward to reconnecting with you on Sunday December 4! 

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching!  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* of charge, with no obligation and no strings attached!  And if YOU haven’t coached with me in awhile and would like a “tune up” session please give yourself this gift!

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on fulfilling them, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

“Make it a habit to tell people thank you — To express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return.  Truly appreciate those around you, and you’ll soon find many others around you.  Truly appreciate life and you’ll find that you have more of it.” – Ralph Marston

[This slightly-edited blog first ran in 2014.  I give this incredibly powerful prosperity tip to all my Personal Success Coaching clients, and I want to share it with YOU, too!]

Feeling grateful is my habitual way of being, but that wasn’t always so.

It came from consciously following a daily practice that has greatly increased both my joy and the level of material abundance in my life. When I began it years ago, there was much more fear than gratitude inside of me.

Soon after my wonderful husband Rick and I bought our big expensive Dream Home in late 2006, the national real estate bubble burst with a vengeance.  Our home’s value plummeted by hundreds of thousands of dollars and my Realtor husband’s income evaporated overnight. At the same time, many of my clients had to quit coaching because their incomes also had been decimated by the Great Recession.

For months, I regularly woke up around 3 AM with a cold wave of fear engulfing me as I lay next to my sleeping husband thinking, “What if we lose our house?  Could we end up living in our car like the people on the evening news? Would our friends let us sleep on their couch?  What will happen to our beloved pets?”  I lay there envisioning the Worst Case Scenario in living color until the alarm clock finally went off. Then I would drag myself out of bed and try to put on a happy face for my family and my clients, but inside I was terrified.

Because of my faith and my coaching training, I knew the antidote to fear was to change my thoughts.  So I began to study every book and audio about prosperity that I could get my hands on. The consistent message coming to me from all the Master Manifesters was “Be grateful.”  That seemed like a real stretch, given our bleak circumstances and the predicted length of the Great Recession.

One day, I was watching Oprah interview Sarah Ban Brethnach, the author of Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy.  Sarah recommended that the path to greater abundance started with keeping a Daily Gratitude Journal. Oprah enthusiastically endorsed the practice, saying that it had changed her life.  Well, Oprah was already one of the richest people on the planet, so that got my attention. What could possibly make her life better?

Oprah said that writing down five things she felt grateful for in a Gratitude Journal every day changed her life because it made her notice all the GOOD things in her life, big and small.  On a challenging day when she was feeling discouraged or stressed, she had to really pay attention because she knew she would have to come up with five things that she was thankful for at the end of the day!  Keeping a Daily Gratitude Journal made her aware that we are all so blessed to have a life we often take for granted.

That got me thinking about all that I was taking for granted in my own life: My loving, healthy family and pets, an abundance of material comforts like indoor plumbing, a refrigerator full of food, electricity, a microwave, washer and dryer, clean running water, etc. etc. etc. And most of all, we are blessed with personal freedoms that billions of other people don’t enjoy. I was living a modest middle-class lifestyle that would be considered royalty in most of world!

Then I understood the Prosperity Secret that Oprah knew: All I really needed in my life was more GRATITUDE for what I already have, instead of worrying about what’s lacking. We know that what we focus on expands. I was focusing on lack, so I was attracting more LACK into my life.  If I wanted to experience more PROSPERITY, I needed to focus on all the wonderful blessings I had in my life right NOW!

I started a Daily Gratitude Journal that very day. But I write down 10 things I’m thankful for each day because it’s hard to stop at five! My husband and I also began saying “grace” together before our evening meal, giving thanks to God for the specific blessings we are present to right NOW.

Slowly but surely, with a lot of Divine guidance, we began working through every single financial challenge we faced — settling five years of back taxes, discharging a bankruptcy, recovering from losing one car and two houses. Along the way, our family never missed a meal, paid a bill late or spent one night without our own roof over our heads.

Now, my husband’s real estate business is flourishing again, my coaching practice is nearly full and we are experiencing greater financial abundance and personal happiness today than the day we married nine years ago.

One of the clearest explanations of the very real power of GRATITUDE to create more good in your life is found in Felicia Blanco Searcy’s wonderful book Do Greater Things: Following in Jesus’ Footsteps. She writes: 

“…physicists have shown that there are a multitude of possibilities available to us at any given moment. All options are there at once, waiting for us to decide where we will put our focus, which then determines which possibility will manifest. 

…Gratitude opens us to the possibility that anything can happen.  It increases our capacity to entertain other options even if we can’t begin to see how they might happen.  It gives us a renewed sense of hope and brings our focus back to the possibility that things will turn out well. 

As we focus on what is good in our lives, we bring the favorable possibility out from the shadows into the light of day.  We clothe the desired choice and make it real with our thoughts and feelings.  As we focus on gratitude, or appreciation, we give God the space to bring about other possibilities that are beyond our human understanding or imaginings.” 

If you aren’t keeping a Daily Gratitude Journal, I highly recommend starting yours today. Take it from Oprah (and me), your life will never be the same!

NOTE:  If you would like your own F*R*E*E* subscription to receive A Cup of Caroll three Sundays a month, go to my website at www.practicalprosperitycoach.com then click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top and enter your name and email. This information will be kept 100% confidential and will not be given to anyone else for any other purpose.

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to give a friend, colleague or loved one a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no obligation and no strings attached!  You can give this to as many people who will really appreciate it as you wish.  (If you haven’t been in coaching with me for a while, feel free to claim it for YOURSELF, too!) 

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help them clarify their Big Goals and get into ACTION to make this their BEST year yet, have them email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com to schedule their session.

 

 

 

 

 

“In order to change your life and start living a new one that you’ve never lived before, your faith in miracles, and yourself, must be greater than your fear.” – found in You Are a Bad Ass by Jen Sincero

This is a slightly-edited blog that first ran in 2014.  I believe the message is still very timely and important to remember as you go after a Big Goal:

Have you ever found yourself wanting to do something that will bring you great rewards but you can’t seem to get motivated enough to pursue it?  You hate hearing yourself making the same old excuses, but you just can’t seem to get going.  You feel stuck for no real reason. Why is that?

Well, there IS a very real barrier between you and all that you really yearn for.  In my 11+ years of professional coaching, helping hundreds of clients reach their Big Goals, I’ve seen that any self-paralysis inevitably involves a Limiting Belief that is buried deep in their unconscious mind.

What is a “limiting” belief anyway?  Well, all beliefs are the same in one sense. A belief is not the “truth”; it is simply your personal interpretation of the facts based on your own experience or someone else’s.  A “limiting” belief is one that holds you back from taking the actions you must take to pursue your dreams.

Beliefs form when an event occurs — especially when similar events recur and you notice an apparent pattern — and the Inner Protector part of your Ego immediately tries to interpret what it means. It tries to figure out, “What caused this bad thing to happen?  What does it mean about me?  What does it mean about other people?  What rule can I make up so I don’t let this painful scenario happen to me again?”  This is a normal and important risk-minimizing defense mechanism the human psyche is hard-wired for.

For instance, you have a bad romantic breakup and your Inner Protector decides, “This relationship was the worst thing that’s ever happened to me! I am NEVER going to get involved with someone like that again!”  So months later, when you are introduced to a potentially great partner whose political opinion (or eyes or laugh or moustache) reminds you of The Heartbreaker’s, your Ego tries to protect you from re-living the same painful scenario by telling you, “This person is going to break my heart just like that other one did! I can’t let myself get burned twice –I have to run away NOW!” 

I recently coached two clients whose personal Limiting Beliefs were holding them back from taking positive actions that could help them reach their Big Goals.

The first client’s Big Goal was to have a happy marriage. He and his wife of just a few months were caught up in endless bickering over petty issues that neither of them really cared about. He couldn’t offer a rational reason for why neither could refrain from arguing, but attributed it to his wife’s “stubbornness.” When pressed, he admitted he was similarly inclined to dig in his heels when his opinion was challenged.

As we talked, he recalled that as a boy, whenever he was shown to be wrong, some of his family members would mock him and call him “stupid.” As a result, whenever he had to give in to someone else’s authority or opinion, he felt disrespected. He even lost jobs by arguing with supervisors, trying to prove himself “right.” His wife voicing her opinion that a particular TV show she wanted to watch was “better” than what he wanted to watch felt emasculating to him.  Their petty fights soon turned into bitter yelling matches.

In a last ditch effort to save their marriage, they went to family counseling. There, his wife recognized that she also had the experience of feeling put down for her opinions by her ex-husband.  Although she submitted to all his wishes just to placate him, her Ex expressed only contempt for her and eventually left her. So her Inner Protector created the unconscious Limiting Belief that whenever her new, loving husband requested anything contrary to what she wanted, she MUST stand her ground or she would lose her sense of self again and have her heart broken once more.

Once they both recognized that they were arguing with each other because of old Limiting Beliefs their Egos created in response to past relationships, they were able to let down their defenses and relate to each other as the loving, giving individuals they truly are.  They no longer yell and fight, but calmly discuss their differences of opinion and work together to create solutions.

In her first year in a successful network marketing company my second client’s team of business partners grew very quickly. But over the past year, her organization has been shrinking, along with her paycheck and dreams of eventual financial freedom for her family.  In fact, she hasn’t sponsored a new team member in over a year.  When I asked her why, she told me a year ago, her strongest business builder left for another opportunity and took most of her best people with her. Even worse, the former Teammate was a close personal friend who has now has broken off all contact with her. “It broke my heart,” she said.

The Limiting Belief stopping her from re-building her earlier success was obvious: If she sponsored another go-getter who could make her team a success, they might leave and break her heart all over again. That potential pain was just too much for her Inner Protector to allow her to risk, so she stayed mired in excuses about being too tired and not having enough hours in the day to re-start her business, although she had built it before under the exact same conditions.

But here’s the great news about beliefs: Since we make them up ourselves, we have the power to CHANGE them whenever we want!  We can simply choose a new, Empowering Belief that does not drag our past into our future. Beliefs are not “good” or “bad” — but neither are they neutral.  Every belief you create will either hold you back or empower you to pursue your Big Dreams. Your past experience cannot doom you to future defeat – only your FEAR of recreating the past can do that.

Remember, prosperity is more than money and riches.  Retired minister Rev. Margaret has a great definition: “Prosperity is living in a state of TOTAL well-being, which includes being happy, healthy and enjoying great relationships. To create true prosperity, we must let go of what no longer serves us so we can move toward the greater Good that God has waiting for us.”

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to give a friend, colleague or loved one a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no obligation and no strings attached!  You can give this to as many people who will really appreciate it as you wish.  (If you haven’t been in coaching with me for a while, feel free to claim it for YOURSELF, too!)

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help them clarify their Big Goals and get into ACTION to make this their BEST year yet, have them email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or call 888-503-8145 to schedule their session.

“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie 

Gratitude is THE most powerful positive emotion to attract all the wonderful things you desire into your life…We can never feel or express TOO MUCH gratitude for all the good already present in our lives. Here is an updated version of one of my favorite past blogs about Gratitude. I hope you enjoy it! 

As you know, tomorrow is Memorial Day in the U.S.A.  This holiday — originally called Decoration Day — began in 1868, as a time set aside to commemorate those who died fighting in the Civil War by decorating their graves with flags and flowers.

But I find it equally appropriate to celebrate Memorial Day by taking a moment to remember with gratitude ALL those who have gone before you who have contributed to making you who are today:

  • All the strangers, friends and loved ones who served in the armed forces to preserve your precious freedom.
  • Your parents, grandparents and other dear ones who raised you and helped you determine the values you choose to live by.
  • All the mentors and teachers who freely gave of their precious time to help guide you along your purposeful path.
  • Everyone who has ever showed you the encouragement and love that nurtured your spirit and helped you grow into your authentic Self.
  • Yes, and even those who disagreed with you honorably or sought to undermine you dishonorably — because they, too, had a hand in strengthening your character and determination to succeed against all odds.

Let us today transform our sadness at the loss of those who contributed so much to our lives into abundant GRATITUDE for all they have contributed to us.  While sadness and regret are negative emotions that attract more pain, gratitude is one of the most powerful positive emotions there is.

Gratitude can help you put the Law of Attraction to work to make your most heartfelt dreams and ambitious intentions a reality.  If “energy attracts like energy,” as the Law of Attraction states, then feeling GRATEFUL for all those who have blessed your life with their presence can only attract more good to bless you.

And because an abundantly prosperous life involves so much more than just money, I want to close with something profoundly simple, yet powerful, that I learned from a wise minister, Rev. Margaret Melanie.

These are the Four Spiritual Truths to live by, which can help you create a life that is truly abundant and prosperous in every way. (I love them so much, I had them made into a plaque for my office.)

  • Breathe deeply. Breathing slowly and deeply nourishes your body with oxygen, makes you more alert to new ideas, and settles you down.  It makes you aware of being in the NOW and living fully in the present moment — which is really the only time that you have available to you.
  • Live Fully. Go out and make a miracle today.  God is busy and needs your help.
  • Kiss slowly. Appreciate all the love in your life – in ALL the forms it may take.  Don’t give your dearest loved ones just a hasty peck on the cheek as you bolt out the door.  Take time to really appreciate them and show them your love.
  • Love wastefully. Don’t hold back.  Spread your love around lavishly, so there isn’t a drop left at the end of your life.  Love can’t be hoarded; it must be spent to be enjoyed!

I hope you enjoy a gratitude-filled Memorial Day weekend with those you love (two-footed and/or four-footed)! 

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to give a friend, colleague or loved one a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no obligation and no strings attached!  You can give this to as many people who will really appreciate it as you wish.  (If you haven’t been in coaching with me for a while, feel free to claim it for YOURSELF, too!) 

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help them clarify their Big Goals and get into ACTION to make this their BEST year yet, have them email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or call 888-503-8145 to schedule their session.   

“When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds: your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties and talents become alive, and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.” – Patanjali

Today, Spring officially begins in the Northern Hemisphere.  As life blooms anew around us, we get “Spring Fever” — the urge to shake off the winter doldrums and begin pursuing our dreams with renewed energy and passion.

So it’s fitting that we have spent the month examining the common Limiting Beliefs that “It’s too late” or “You’re too old” to reach your Big Goals. Because the ultimate effects on your life are unknown, even positive changes can look like potential threats to your mental, emotional or physical well-being. While these Limiting Beliefs are generally far from the truth, the Inner Protector part of your Ego plants them in your consciousness to dissuade you from taking steps to reach your goals, believing it is keeping you safe by keeping you stuck.

Last week, I shared with you the inspiring story of how one of my clients refused to let the “Your Too Old” story and the long odds of success stop her from winning a coveted place in the New York Marathon, which she will run this November to celebrate a milestone birthday and open the next chapter of her life. Now, I want to share with you two equally inspiring stories of women who also overcame these two insidious Limiting Beliefs.

A full-time wife and mother for over twenty years, “Elsie” escaped her emotionally-abusive marriage as soon as her children were grown. When she came to me for coaching, she had a part-time job and lived with a female roommate in order to make ends meet. But Elsie dreamed of finding a rewarding career to pursue that would eventually provide retirement security via a pension. And, dreaming even bigger, she also wanted to find true love and remarry one day.

At age 66, it would be tempting for Elsie to buy that it was “too late” to begin a new career and that she is “too old” to find the love she knew she deserved. But Elsie was undaunted.

We focused first on her most critical Big Goal: finding a rewarding career.  At first, she pursued government jobs, since those are among the last that offer real “pensions” besides Social Security.  Then one day, it came to her that she could pursue a teaching career.  She already had a part-time job teaching English as a second language (ESL) to adults and she had a California credential to teach elementary school, but she hadn’t taught children in many years. Still, the idea kept getting stronger and we both thought it could be the “How” for fulfilling her Big Goal that God/The Universe was guiding her to.

She lacked one certification that was a new requirement since she last taught. She thought it was going to take a number of months to complete via an online course. But then she learned of an intensive summer school course that was being offered about 90 minutes from her home. She found housing close to the university, and went home on the weekends.  In just eight weeks, she passed the course and was free to apply for teaching positions in her area.

Unfortunately, the school year had just started, and all full-time positions were filled. While she waited to be called for substitute teaching, she discovered another part-time opening for an ESL adult ed position near her home, and was immediately hired.

As she worked purposefully toward fulfilling her career dream, we turned our attention to her relationship dream. She decided to try online dating and I recommended eHarmony, the site where I met my own wonderful husband, Rick, ten years ago.  I reviewed the profile she created and gave her a few tips to make it more appealing.

In the first few weeks, nothing much came of the matches she received.  Some men didn’t respond to her, while others didn’t appeal to her because of their photos.  I told her my own story of how Rick and I almost missed our date with destiny because neither of us cared for the other’s online photo.  Thankfully, we overcame those hasty prejudgments!

In December, Elsie decided to take a break from coaching for a few months, wanting to finish up her ESL semester before resuming coaching to help her land the perfect full-time teaching job.  Busy with my full slate of clients, I lost track of her until last month. When I emailed to check on how she was doing, I received this amazing reply:

“Hi, Caroll.  I am engaged to John from Oregon.  We met on eHarmony and have spent several long weekends together. After school ends May 19, I will move up to his lovely home. We are getting married in his church on June 18 and have had 2 meetings with the minister. I will have to work in Oregon and have applied for my Oregon teaching credential.”

I’d say Elsie didn’t just overcome those two Old, Limiting Beliefs; she decimated them!

The second inspiring story is from my client “Dee,” who wanted to create more prosperity in her life.  The company where she worked full-time for many years was steadily going downhill, following the death of the main partner. The remaining partners didn’t value or treat her well, giving her less and less responsibility, which resulted in a smaller and smaller paycheck.  Besides the financial strain on her family, this treatment took a toll on her confidence, which dampened her ability to grow her own bookkeeping business.

Middle-aged and divorced, Dee is the sole support of a multi-generational extended family. She is a caring, selfless person who gives much to others and demands little in return.  The one thing she has consistently done for herself is to take night classes to earn her MBA, in hopes of building a more secure financial future. Our coaching focused on strengthening her belief in herself.  I told her that nobody was going to value her any more than she valued herself.  She knew that was true, but the more her bosses belittled and disrespected her, the less valuable she felt.

One day, a stranger struck up a conversation and asked her what she did for a living.  She told him about her bookkeeping business and mentioned that she was going to complete her MBA this June.   She was taken aback when this total stranger pronounced, “Don’t you know that you will be competing for jobs with sharp young grads in their twenties? There are people with PhDs working at MacDonald’s right now. Why are you wasting your time on that at your age? “

That’s when something deep inside her shifted and she finally took a stand for her own value, stating, “God approves of me. I don’t need the approval of anyone else.  How it’s all going to work out is up to God. I am OK with my choices and I am going to finish my MBA.”

Just weeks after her bold declaration, things completely shifted for Dee.  Although her old job is now half the hours it originally was, several new clients have come to her “out of nowhere,” for free-lance bookkeeping jobs — BIG jobs.  One company is headquartered in another state, where she will periodically travel to oversee five employees.  She has even hired a part-time helper to handle some of the work. “I am finally doing what I have always dreamed of,” Dee told me, excitedly.  “I am actually my own boss! Dee Consulting is legit!”

Too old?  Too late?  Not for Dee.  Not for Elsie.  How about YOU?  Why are you still sitting on the couch?  It’s Spring Fever time….Time to go out and pursue your Big Dreams with gusto!

PLEASE NOTE: A Cup of Caroll will be taking Easter Sunday off.  I look forward to connecting with you again on April 3!

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to give a friend, colleague or loved one a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no obligation and no strings attached!  You can give this to as many people who will really appreciate it as you wish.  (If you haven’t been in coaching with me for a while, feel free to claim it for YOURSELF, too!)

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help them clarify their Big Goals and get into ACTION to make this their BEST year yet, have them contact me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com  or 888-503-8145 to schedule their session.   

 

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