Time Management


April 18, 2021

“All distractions are equal.” – Leslie Zann

In the last blog, we discussed the revolutionary approach to reaching your Big Goals presented by Gary Keller and Jay Papsan in their amazing book The One Thing.  (Keller is the co-founder of Keller-Williams Real Estate, the largest real estate company in the world.)

The authors say you must make your Big Goal the ONE priority in your professional life and then focus daily on the ONE Thing you must do to reach it.  First, determine what specific actions you must take each day, each week and each month and then block the time in your appointment planner to allow yourself to focus on carrying out those actions without interruption.

Bottom line: Productivity is the KEY to success and TIME BLOCKING is the key to productivity. 

But, as we all know, focusing on anything during your workday without interruption is a challenge.  Just ask any parent of school age children who is working from home during the pandemic.  But even if you are lucky enough to be working in an office, there are plenty of distractions from colleagues who try to hang out at your cubicle or a boss who has an urgent question or just the usual lineup of office meetings that are 20% useful and 80% wasted time.

What, then, can you do to consistently follow your One Thing plan to be productive in pursuing your Big Goal? The key is to develop a STRATEGY and adopt the right MINDSET. Here’s how:

Protect Your Time Block

First and foremost, you must commit to protecting your Time Block.  The authors say, “The world doesn’t know your purpose or priorities and isn’t responsible for them – you are.  So it’s your job to protect your time blocks from all those who don’t know what matters to you, and from yourself when you forget…The best way to protect your time blocks is to adopt the mindset that they can’t be moved.  So, when someone tries to double-book you, just say, ‘I’m sorry, I already have an appointment at that time’ and offer other options.”

But we know that’s tough when the requester is a high-level person in your life: “How do you say no to anyone important – your boss, a key client, your mom – who asks you to do something with a high sense of urgency?  One way is to say YES and then ask, ‘If I have that done by [a specific time in the future], would that work?’ Most often these requests are more about an immediate need to hand a task off than about a need for it to be done immediately, so the requester usually just wants to know it will get done.”

But what if the request really IS urgent and it comes at the time you have blocked to be productively working on your ONE Thing that day? “In this situation, follow the rule ‘If you erase, you must replace’ and immediately reschedule your time block.”

I agree!  I have always recommended to my coaching clients that they leave at least one hour of unscheduled “white space” in their planner each day.  Then if something comes along that truly MUST be handled during their Time Block, they can use their free hour to make up that ONE Thing productivity time.  If nothing gets in the way, they can reward themselves for their productivity with an hour of “Me Time” to do whatever they want!

Finally, you must overcome your own Ego’s constant preference for keeping you “safe” by keeping you from carrying out your One Thing plan for the day.

“The key” the authors assert, “is to fully internalize the domino fall that will happen when your ONE Thing gets done, and remember that everything else you might do or have to do will be easier or unnecessary.”  The authors even helpfully include a colorful little sign you can pull out of the book and hang on your office door handle that says “In case I can’t say NO, this sign will have to do it for me.”

The Four Thieves of Productivity

Keller and Papasan warn that there are “four thieves of productivity” that can stop you from accomplishing your Big Goals and they tell you exactly how to avoid each of them:

1) The first thief is an inability to say “NO” – This comes as no surprise to us recovering People Pleasers! “Peers will ask for your advice and help. Co-workers will want you on their team. Friends will request your assistance. Strangers will seek you out.  Invitations and interruptions will come at you from everywhere imaginable. How you handle all of this determines the time you’re able to devote to your ONE Thing and the results you’re ultimately able to produce.” The solution is to respectfully say NO promptly, and (if you can) give them a lead to someone who might help them. Bottom line: “If you can’t say no a lot, you’ll never truly be able to say yes to achieving your ONE Thing. Literally, it’s one or the other – and you get to decide.”

2) The second Thief of productivity is the Fear of Chaos. “Focusing on ONE Thing has a guaranteed consequence: other things don’t get done…Other areas of your life may experience chaos in direct proportion to the time you put in on your ONE Thing.  It’s important for you to accept it instead of fighting it.”

During a very busy fourth quarter of 2020, my home office looked like a war zone.  It was hard to go in there each day, stepping over piles of binders and folders and seeing the dust bunnies in the corners. But I put blinders on and did my One Thing each day because I knew a pristine office wasn’t going to make me successful.  Eventually, we always get a chance to catch up on the truly critical things.  When things quieted down during the Holidays, I was able to devote a half day to cleaning and organizing my office. That felt great, but not as great as what I had accomplished toward my Big Goal.

3) The third Thief is Poor Health Habits. This is the opposite of their advice about putting up with chaos for a while in order to do your One Thing.  You can never put your health on hold  while you pursue your dreams. “Personal energy mismanagement is a silent thief of productivity.  When we keep borrowing against our future by poorly protecting our energy, there is a predictable outcome of either slowly running out of gas or prematurely crashing and burning.”  Instead, here is the authors’ Highly Productive Person’s Daily Energy Plan:

  • Meditate and pray for spiritual energy.
  • Eat right, exercise and sleep sufficiently for physical energy.
  • Hug, kiss and laugh with loved ones for emotional energy.
  • Set goals, plan and calendar for mental energy.
  • Time block your ONE Thing for business energy.

4) The fourth Thief is an Environment that Doesn’t Support Your Goals. Our physical surroundings and especially the people we surround ourselves with influence our health, our mindset and ultimately our level of success. “Surrounding yourself with the right people is the right thing to do.  While attitude thieves will rob you of your energy, effort and resolve, supportive people will do what they can to encourage or assist you.  Ultimately, being with success-minded people creates what researchers call a ‘positive spiral of success’ where they lift you up and send you on your way….Hanging out with people who seek success will strengthen your motivation and positively push your performance.”

The authors strongly recommend getting an Accountability Partner to support you in reaching your Big Goal.  They say that a professional Coach makes the BEST Accountability Partner, but you can also ask a trusted colleague or friend to keep you honest and on track. “An accountability partner will positively impact your productivity…. Just knowing they are waiting for your next progress report can spur you to better results. Ideally, a coach can ‘coach’ you on how to maximize your performance over time.  This is how the very best become the very best.  You’ll be hard-pressed to find anyone who achieves extraordinary results without [a Coach].”

There you have it — your foolproof Formula for Success: If you are committed to reaching your Big Goals, spend your working hours identifying the ONE Thing you must do each day to reach them, don’t let the Four Thieves waylay you, and get support in holding yourself accountable for doing what you promised to do.

Above all, remember no one succeeds alone and no one fails alone and, in the words of comedian Lily Tomlin, “The road to success is always under construction!”

Coaching Results

“Caroll has been very helpful in guiding me to clarify what my most important goals are, what they mean to me and why they are important.  Learning to focus on the important things makes me more efficient and able to get there faster.  It’s a huge stress reliever to know where you want to go and the necessary steps to get there.” – June G., Realtor ™

I want to be of service to YOU and your friends, colleagues and loved ones! To schedule a F*R*E*E, no-obligation one-hour Success Breakthrough Session by phone that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on making them a reality, please email me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

April 11, 2021

“You’ve got to think about ‘big things’ while you’re doing small things, so that all the small things go in the right direction.” – Alvin Toffler

If you didn’t get a chance to read the last blog (The Balance Myth – Blog 399), I highly recommend you do so.  This blog is a follow-on to the topic of “Life Balance” that we started examining in that blog. 

The unique approach to creating what we think of as “Life Balance” that Gary Keller and Jay Papasan teach in their fabulous book The One Thing involves knowing that it actually takes constant COUNTERBALANCING – making constant, small adjustments on a daily basis  – for you to feel fulfilled and happy in your private life while still achieving purposeful Big Goals in your career or business.

As you will recall, the bottom-line secret, to creating a counterbalanced personal life you love is this: “In your personal life, go SHORT and avoid long periods where you’re out of balance.  Going short lets you stay connected to all the things [and people] that matter most and move them along together.”

In other words, you cannot neglect your health and fitness, your relationships, your homelife or your spiritual life for long periods or they will be irreparably damaged.  You cannot pressure yourself to try to serve everyone and attend to everything that you want to all at the same time, but you CAN prioritize and focus on the ones that need the most attention on a given day. If your child needs you now, that can’t wait. That means de-cluttering your home might have to wait another few days but you will get back it when it’s time to “counterbalance” and make cleanliness and order in your environment a top priority.

However, the authors say, in your career or business, you have to take a much different approach if you are going to reach your Big Goals with maximum efficiency, ultimately allowing more time for your personal life: “In your professional life, go LONG and make peace with the idea that the pursuit of extraordinary results may require you to be out of balance for long periods.  Going long allows you to focus on what matters most, even at the expense of other, lesser priorities.  In your personal life, nothing gets left behind.  At work, it’s required.”

Now, let’s examine the authors’ revolutionary “go LONG” approach that they say will get you to your BIGGEST stretch goals in less time with less wasted effort than most people can imagine. There are two major aspects to this winning approach: developing the Practical tools you need AND adopting the right Mindset for success. 

The practical tools they teach are simple and easy to learn and use and virtually guaranteed to bring you success – as long as you develop the right mindset so you don’t sabotage your best-laid plans.  First, let’s examine the practical tools you can use to achieve your Big Goal:

The Three P’s

The key to producing extraordinary results is to follow the three P’s:

1) First, identify your PURPOSE. Get clear on WHY your Big Goal matters to you — what it is going to bring you? Why is it worth getting up in the morning and pursuing it with focus and drive for however long it takes until you get it?

2) Then make your Big Goal your ONE PRIORITY. “Your most important priority is the ONE Thing you can do right now that will help you achieve what matters most to you.”

3) The third P is PRODUCTIVITY – You must create a clear plan that will ensure you stick with it consistently, day in and day out, until you achieve it. “Write your goals down and keep them close. Knowing your future goal is how you begin. Identifying the STEPS you need to accomplish along the way keeps your thinking clear while you uncover the right priority you need to accomplish RIGHT NOW.”

The KEY to Productivity

The authors believe the ONE great, overriding KEY to productivity is TIME BLOCKING. This is so vital to your success that there’s a whole chapter in the book focused just on how to effectively block your time.

I loved reading that because, in my 16-plus years as a Personal Success Coach, I have always told my clients: If you want to ensure that you have ENOUGH time and are doing the RIGHT things at the RIGHT time (AKA Productivity) you MUST plan your monthly goals and then lay out your weekly and your daily schedule in BLOCKS OF TIME in your planner.

The authors state, “Productive people get more done, achieve better results, and earn far more in their hours than the rest. They do so because they devote maximum time to being productive on their top priority, their ONE Thing.  They time blog their ONE Thing and then protect their time blocks with a vengeance.  They’ve connected the dots between working their time blocks consistently and the extra-ordinary results they seek.”

They go on to say, “Time blocking is a very results-oriented way of viewing and using time.  It’s a way of making sure that what has to be done GETS done… Time blocking harnesses your energy and centers it on your most important work.  It’s productivity’s greatest tool.”

How to Time Block

Time blocking is a simple habit to install, which I recommend to all my coaching clients: Spend one quiet, uninterrupted hour each weekend planning your upcoming week.

First, review your ONE Specific, Measurable Goal for the MONTH – The ONE Thing you vow to accomplish this month that will make everything else you could be doing either easier or unnecessary for reaching your Big Goal.  Then block out time to work on that ONE Thing EVERY DAY during your upcoming workweek.  

If you are serious about reaching your BIG GOAL by the end of the year, you must reach your monthly ONE Thing goal and that means you must work on it productively each workday. The authors’ recommended time for you to FOCUS solely on accomplishing your One Thing is HALF of your working hours each workday. If you work an eight-hour day, that means FOUR hours are devoted solely to working on your One Thing. The rest of your day, you tend to all the other routine tasks that have to be done – answering email, training, meetings, errands, etc. But none of those tasks is allowed to get in the way of your devoted One Thing time.

This undoubtedly sounds like a huge amount of time that you don’t think you have. But remember, you have already asked yourself the book’s Focusing Question about your blocked time: “Today, what is the ONE Thing I can do for my ONE Thing [Big Goal], such that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”

If you focus on accomplishing the ONE Thing and work productively toward it each day, week and month, a lot of the “busy work” you have been doing in your career, your business or on your passion project will end up being unnecessary. New ways of doing things more efficiently will emerge as you go along. Shortcuts will be found. Serendipity will happen.

You actually will GAIN more time freedom in the end because you worked with single-minded focus on accomplishing the RIGHT things that will get you to your Big Goal more quickly and easily than the haphazard approach most people take and the distractions they allow to derail their plan.

If you cannot devote four hours a day, that’s OK.  Just work as efficiently as you can toward the ultimate goal of spending 50% of your working hours on the ONE Thing that you know that you need to accomplish in order to reach your Weekly Goal, which will then carry you to your Monthly Goal, which will ultimately lead you to fulfill your BIG GOAL for the year that is going to make your life a dream and give you much MORE free time to spend on the people and things you love in your personal life.

We will finish this series on The One Thing next time by looking at the critical MINDSET side of the equation.  It’s great to have a solid plan, but as soon as you begin to work it, all kinds of challenges will inevitably arise that can derail it. Knowing what those pitfalls are and being ready to address them with the right attitude will ensure your success!

Coaching Results:

“I would not have the belief and confidence in myself or my team without Caroll, nor would I be able to bring out the best in my team without her coaching.  You should coach with Caroll if you want to create confidence in yourself, a positive mindset, a successful business and joyful approach to life.” – Lisa Davis, Top Team Leader for Crunchi Cosmetics

I want to be of service to YOU and your friends, colleagues and loved ones! To schedule a F*R*E*E, no-obligation one-hour Success Breakthrough Session by phone that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on making them a reality, please contact me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

March 28, 2021

“A balanced life is a lie…. Purpose, meaning, significance – these are what make a successful life.” – from The One Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papsan

It feels fabulous to have the time to write a brand new post again!

Since the late fall of 2020, I have had too many coaching resources to study, video trainings to take, new website/branding content to create and other work projects to attend to simultaneously.  On top of that, since my wonderful husband Rick had back surgery in October, many new duties fell to me at home that he had always attended to.

At first, I felt like I was failing in ALL areas of my life because I couldn’t accomplish EVERYTHING I wanted to do for my business and my home life simultaneously.  What kept me sane was remembering to breathe, having faith that God would give me the strength and direction to do whatever I needed to do in the time I had to do it, and making a short list of my top priorities each day. Soon, I learned to be at peace with just getting the MUSTS done and letting the rest go until tomorrow.

Happily, my career is back on a more manageable pace and Rick is doing great with his full recovery.  But this personal growth experience got me intensely interested in the topic of so-called Life Balance, since my life felt completely “out of balance” in both the personal and professional realms.

Achieving an elusive “life balance” is usually the number one thing my coaching clients mention among their top three Big Goals. Women especially feel pulled in too many directions between work and their family responsibilities, with nothing left for themselves. I couldn’t really empathize with them before my own life went off the rails, but now I get it. Believe me!

One of my real estate/entrepreneur clients recently recommended a fabulous book called The One Thing, by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan.  Gary is the co-founder of Keller Williams Realty International, which began as a single office in Austin and is now the largest real estate company in the world.

This book, which is meant to help us succeed BIG in our careers and live fulfilling personal lives, has a whole chapter devoted to debunking the myth that “life balance” exists. They write, “The desire for balance makes sense.  Enough time for everything and everything done in time.  It sounds so appealing that just thinking about it makes us feel serene and peaceful. This calm is so real that we just know it’s the way life was meant to be. But it’s not.”

In order to truly “balance” your work life and personal life, you would have to stay in a “middle” zone, like on a teeter totter. However, in your work and passion projects, “magic happens at the extremes.” If you try to take care of all things all the time, everything gets short changed and you never achieve your Big Dreams.  A life lived in the middle creates mediocre success.

But in your personal life, “When we work too long, eventually our personal life suffers. Falling prey to the belief that long hours are virtuous, we unfairly blame work when we say, ‘I have no life.’ Often, it’s just the opposite. Even if our work doesn’t interfere, our personal life itself can be so full of ‘have-tos’ that we again reach the same defeated conclusion: ‘I have no life.’ And sometimes we get hit from both sides. Some of us face so many personal and professional demands that everything suffers. Breakdown imminent, we once again declare, ‘I have no life!’”

Bingo.  That was my experience exactly. What is the solution, then?

The way to achieve a successful, purposeful and happy life in BOTH your work and personal realms is to learn how to COUNTERBALANCE.

“When we say we’re out of balance,” they write, “we’re usually referring to a sense that some priorities – things that matter to us – are being underserved or unmet. The problem is that when you focus on what is truly important, something will always be underserved.  No matter how hard you try, there will always be things left undone at the end of your day, week, month, year and life….Leaving some things undone is a necessary tradeoff for extraordinary results.  But you can’t leave everything undone, and that’s where counterbalancing comes in. The idea of counterbalancing is that you never go so far that you can’t find your way back or stay so long that there’s nothing waiting for you when you return.”

There are two difference types of counterbalancing: The balancing between work and personal life and the balancing within each.  Work and personal life counterbalancing each require a different strategy, so let’s examine them separately. First, let’s look at your Personal Life and in the next blog we’ll look at what you can do to counterbalance your Work Life.

The authors state, “In your personal world, awareness is the essential ingredient.  Awareness of your spirit and body, awareness of your family and friends, awareness of your personal needs – none of these can be sacrificed if you intend to ‘have a life,’ so you can never forsake them for work or one for the other.  You can move back and forth quickly between these and often even combine activities around them, but you can’t neglect any of them for long. Your personal life requires tight counterbalancing.”

A good example of this principle was uncovered by one of my prospective coaching clients during our complimentary first session.  She felt her job’s time demands were interfering with her family’s happiness.  She longed to bond with her two young children in a special way by spending time at bedtime with each individually, reading to her, listening to her say her prayers and kissing her goodnight.

But her job required her to log into a couple of evening Zoom meetings each week, while other nights, she chose to work in her home office for a couple of hours, seeing it as an opportunity to catch up on work projects. As a result, she felt guilty that her husband often put their kids to bed and read to them most weeknights, while she felt cheated out of having special “Mommy and Me” time with them. Still, she pushed herself to accomplish more work tasks.

This conundrum gave her the opportunity to learn to “counterbalance” between her work and home life!  I reminded her that her kids wouldn’t be little for long and that she couldn’t put off this special bonding opportunity with them and expect it to be waiting for her when she had more time.  In fact, the authors of The One Thing made the same point: “Do you really think you can ever get back a child’s bedtime story or a birthday?…Do you think you can cut a deal with God that time stands still for you, holding off on anything important until you are ready to participate again?”

So we came up with a simple plan: Each weekend, she would look at her next week’s work schedule and PLAN which nights she had to be on a Zoom conference and which nights she had discretion about how she spent her time.  She was able to prioritize several nights each week that she could have precious bedtime bonding with her girls, and the other nights, her husband was happy to cover for her. The next time we spoke she was so happy and the whole family was grateful that they weren’t letting this precious time disappear.

Keller and Papasan say the secret to creating a counterbalanced personal life you love is this: “In your personal life, go SHORT and avoid long periods where you’re out of balance.  Going short lets you stay connected to all the things that matter most and move them along together. In your professional life, go LONG and make peace with the idea that the pursuit of extraordinary results may require you to be out of balance for long periods.  Going long allows you to focus on what matters most, even at the expense of other, lesser priorities.  In your personal life, nothing gets left behind. At work, it’s required.

“Acknowledge that your life actually has multiple areas and that each requires a minimum of attention for you to feel that you ‘have a life.’ Drop any one and you will feel the effects. This requires constant awareness. You must never go too long or too far without counterbalancing them so that they are ALL active areas of your life. Your personal life requires it.”

IMPORTANT NOTE: The blog is taking next Easter Weekend off (for counterbalance!) and will return on Sunday April 11 to examine what it takes to SUCCEED BIG by focusing on your One Thing and “going long” in your career and passion projects. 

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

I want to be of service to YOU and your friends, colleagues and loved ones! To schedule a F*R*E*E, no-obligation one-hour Success Breakthrough Session by phone that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on making them a reality, please email me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

March 21, 2021

I had fully intended to write a brand new blog this weekend, but life had other plans. My website is coming along nicely, but there is still content I must get to my ace web designer ASAP and some important errands also came up unexpectedly that just couldn’t wait.

So, with my available time being very short, I decided to go with the flow and repost a lightly-edited blog from last year on a topic that really resonates with me right now.  I’ll bet it does with you, too: How to fully live in the present, experiencing each precious moment with ease and joy, while still getting stuff done! 

April 25, 2020

“Small deeds done are better than great deeds planned.” – Peter Marshall

The message that came to me over and over this week is one that most of us need to be constantly reminded of: Stay present and live each moment of life as it comes.

As I thought about the word “present,” it dawned on me that this one word has at least three main meanings which, while different, are all related.  First, as a noun, it means “gift,” like a Christmas present. It also means “now,” as in this present moment in time.  As a verb, “present” also means “to offer something” (as one might offer a gift).

In all these interconnected meanings, being present IS a gift because it enables us to fully experience and appreciate every precious moment of life.  Now, more than ever, the whole world is keenly aware of the precious fragility of life — that we could be here today and gone tomorrow.

A recent daily thought from Joel Osteen also reminded me of what a special gift each moment of life is, especially all the little simple things we often overlook or take for granted. This is especially true now, when the pandemic has forced us to slow down and re-arrange our usual daily routines:

Enjoy the Simple Thingsby Joel Osteen

“Don’t miss a great season in your life wishing you had more, complaining about what you don’t have.  The real joy in life is in the simple things – making memories with your family, riding your bikes together, watching the sunset with your spouse, or staring up at the stars at night.  You don’t have to have big vacations or lots of money to have fun.  Learn to enjoy the simple things in life.

Could it be that you’re at the right place for the season that you’re in, but you’re not enjoying it?  Maybe if you would step back and see it from a new perspective, you would realize that God has you in the palms of His hands.  He knows where you are, what you like, and what you don’t like.  Instead of living discontented, frustrated, always wishing you were somewhere else, embrace the place where you are.  See the good. Be grateful for what you have.”

My job is to help my coaching clients get what they want.  Each individual has a Big Goal, and I help them with the mindset tools, strategy and accountability that will enable them to reach that Big Goal, even if it seems far-fetched to someone else.

In my 16-plus years as a Personal Success Coach ™, I have learned that there are TWO fundamental keys to reaching any Big Goal:

1) Focus on what you WANT (not on what you don’t want). Keep your eye on the prize and use mindset tools daily to strengthen your BELIEF that you will get it.

2) Take ONE step at a time toward that outcome you want. Don’t try to figure out the whole HOW for getting there.  You can count on God/The Universe to help you with that, rolling the plan out for you one step at a time.  YOUR job is to take the step that is in front of you right NOW.  Looking too far ahead will only distract you from taking the right action today and make you doubt that it is possible to reach your Big Goal.  If you just stay in the NOW, focusing on carrying out today’s action step, the next perfect step will come to you when the time is right.

A week ago, on a coaching call, one of my clients seemed close to having a panic attack.  She was feeling totally overwhelmed by all the tasks she felt must be done simultaneously – caring for her family, staying mostly inside when she wanted to be outside, trying to come up with an entirely new distance learning curriculum for her students, while trying to consistently work her direct sales side business.  I understood why she wanted to stay in bed with the covers pulled over her head rather than try to organize ALL the many steps she needed to take!

During our call, I got her to take a calm look at things and focus on what small steps she could take NOW to begin to make progress on her many tasks.  As we talked, she thought of some specific resources available to her that she hadn’t been utilizing, and she promised to take just ONE action as soon as we hung up — to call her mentor teacher for lessons plan suggestions and emotional support.

She also came up with a brilliant plan for shaking off her paralyzing sense of overwhelm. She vowed to complete just ONE to THREE action items per day — no more, no less.  That number was emotionally and mentally manageable to her, and she knew that she could prioritize those specific few actions per day and get them done.  Completing them each day would give her a sense of control and accomplishment, which in turn would restore her self-confidence and expectation of success.

When we talked a week later, she sounded like her old can-do self again. She had been carrying out her daily “three things” action plan and was feeling much better. She was getting up early and enjoying her daily walks with her dog again, and grateful to be able to spend more precious time with her family because she wasn’t away all day in the classroom.  She is “embracing where she is” and “being grateful for what she has” in the PRESENT moment, just as Joel Osteen suggests.

We can all emulate my client’s simple approach to creating greater productivity and happiness:  Accept calmly whatever is going on right NOW in your life, do what you can right NOW, and let tomorrow’s steps unfold in God’s perfect time and way.  When we allow ourselves to be fully present in each moment, we will find joy in recognizing the many precious gifts that surround us right NOW.

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

I want to be of service to YOU and your friends, colleagues and loved ones! To schedule a F*R*E*E, no-obligation, one-hour Prosperity Breakthrough Coaching session by phone that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on making them a reality, please email me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

 

March 7, 2021 

I recently completed a series of advanced coaching trainings (live via Zoom), each of which took up the better part of three or four days. And for the past several weeks, I have been working on producing new content for my wonderful web designer to turn into a complete re-branding of my website and social media. It’s all very exciting and fulfilling…. AND tiring! While I am very grateful to be doing this fulfilling work for a living, I must admit to feeling a bit depleted physically and mentally right now.

Next weekend begins Daylight Savings Time for most of us, when it is recommended to change the batteries in home smoke detectors. My thought just now was “My inner battery could really use some re-charging!”  

Many of my clients are solopreneurs and direct sales professionals who are tempted to work 24/7 to grow their businesses and achieve the success they desire and deserve – not to mention handling “bonus” duties like homeschooling that have been thrust upon many of them courtesy of the pandemic.

So, I am sure that most of my cherished readers can relate to this topic right now, too.  Here is a lightly-edited past blog with some great tips to give you greater ease and balance:

August 3, 2019

“I learned that we can do anything, but we can’t do everything…at least not at the same time. So think of your priorities not in terms of what activities you do, but when you do them. Timing is everything.” – Dan Millman in Stress is a Choice 

You may recall that one of my suggestions for “How to Beat Burnout(see blog #188 if you missed it) was to take at least one full day off each week and one entire weekend off each month.

If you find it challenging to imagine creating that much “recharging” time for yourself, I understand.  It’s challenging for me too.  There always seems to be plenty of paperwork, errands and projects to tackle on the two days a week I don’t have coaching clients. But I am striving to walk my talk and take regular time off to rest and re-charge my mind, body and spirit so I can be a more effective Personal Success Coach for my clients, a more attentive and loving wife to my husband, and a happier, more fulfilled ME to myself.

No matter how diligently we try to keep up, the chores will always be there. Trust me, the world will keep spinning if you unplug from them for a few hours a week. Isn’t it more important to nurture yourself and your personal relationships than to have a spotless house or completely orderly office?

I’ve learned to prioritize and do the weekly “musts” like writing this blog first, and then if I also manage to knock off a couple of the “would be nice” chores each week, that’s a plus that makes me feel EVEN better.

What really makes me feel happy and balanced is spending a few hours each week reading, relaxing, enjoying good meals with my husband and watching good television.

Here are four specific suggestions that I know for certain will have a very positive effect on your personal relationships and your mental, emotional and physical well-being IF you follow them:

  • Be fully present. “Haste makes waste,” is accurate. If you focus 100% of your attention on what you are doing, you will do a better job in less time. You may think regular multi-tasking is a time-saver, but it actually makes you chronically half-present in your life. You half-understand what you hear and read, and are emotionally half-present with the people you are with. If you aren’t giving your projects, conversations and reading your full attention, you will eventually miss something critical that will lead to misunderstanding and/or having to completely re-do a task.

One of my clients was dismayed when her five-year-old child recently asked her, “Mommy, why are you always in a hurry?” It’s not the amount of time you spend with them, but the quality of your undivided attention, that makes your loved ones feel that you care about them.

  • Be mindful in your health habits. Obesity studies show that people who eat slowly and savor their food, instead of shoveling it in mindlessly while watching television or working at their desk, consistently consume fewer calories. Taking time to prepare dinner and eat it with your loved ones most evenings will benefit your family relationships, as well as your waistline. Similarly, in your exercise routine, if you do your running, Pilates, yoga poses or weight lifting mindfully with proper form, your muscles will respond faster and avoid injury.
  • Get enough sleep. The late evening hours when the kids are in bed may seem like your ONLY chance to get your own tasks done or just collapse on the couch in front of the TV or on social media.  But the price of sleep deprivation is very high, including stubborn weight gain, emotional and mental stress and a compromised immune system. Falling asleep at the wheel or a tired driver’s slowed response time are now said to cause as many deadly accidents as drunk drivers.

If you discipline yourself to go to bed even 30 minutes earlier on weeknights, it will pay off in greater mental acuity, emotional control, and physical health. Back-lit screens like TV, computers and e-readers have been shown to interfere with your brain’s ability to wind down and let you fall asleep and stay asleep.  Exercising too close to bedtime can keep you awake too. Make the last 30-60 minutes of your evening a quiet time to meditate, converse with your partner or read an enjoyable paper book.

  • Unplug from your devices as often as possible. 84% of smart phone owners use their device while watching TV. Many people are tethered to electronics 24/7. “If you’re with your children and checking your phone all the time, the message to them is ‘Anyone in the world is more important than you,’” says Tanya Shevitz, a spokesperson for Reboot, a Jewish nonprofit dedicated to reinvigorating Jewish culture for a modern world.

Orthodox Jews refrain from business transactions, writing, driving, gardening, shopping, laundry and other tasks from sunset Friday to sunset Saturday, spending time focused on God and their loved ones. But you don’t have to unplug from the internet and your phone just for religious reasons. “Embracing the sensual pleasures of life – having a special meal, lighting candles, having conversations where we really listen to others and listen to what our souls are trying to say to us…is rejuvenating when we give ourselves a day of rest once a week,” Shevitz suggests.

If you commit to making even one small change in one or more of these areas and stick with it, you will begin to create a more balanced, healthy, happy and fulfilling life for yourself and those you love. And don’t you deserve that delight?

IMPORTANT NOTE: In keeping with the message of this blog, A Cup of Caroll will be taking next weekend off and will return on Sunday March 21!

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at www.practicalprosperitycoach.com  and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top. Your name and email will be kept 100% confidential and will not be used by anyone else for any purpose. 

****************** You Can Fulfill Your Big Dreams! ******************** 

To schedule a complimentary Prosperity Breakthrough Session of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

April 26, 2020

“Small deeds done are better than great deeds planned.” – Peter Marshall

The message that came to me over and over again this week is one that most of us need to be constantly reminded of: Stay present and live each moment of life as it comes.

As I thought about the word “present,” it dawned on me that this one word has at least three main meanings which, while different, are all related.  First, as a noun, it means “gift,” like a Christmas present. It also means “now,” as in this present moment in time.  As a verb, “present” also means “to offer something” (as one might offer a gift).

In all these interconnected meanings, being present IS a gift because it enables us to fully experience and appreciate every precious moment of life.  Now, more than ever, the whole world is keenly aware of the precious fragility of life — that we could be here today and gone tomorrow.

Friday’s daily thought from Joel Osteen also reminded me of what a special gift each moment of life is, especially all the “simple” things we often overlook or take for granted. This is especially true now, during this pandemic, which has forced us to slow down and re-arrange our usual daily routines:

Enjoy the Simple Thingsby Joel Osteen

“Don’t miss a great season in your life wishing you had more, complaining about what you don’t have.  The real joy in life is in the simple things – making memories with your family, riding your bikes together, watching the sunset with your spouse, or staring up at the stars at night.  You don’t have to have big vacations or lots of money to have fun.  Learn to enjoy the simple things in life.

Could it be that you’re at the right place for the season that you’re in, but you’re not enjoying it?  Maybe if you would step back and see it from a new perspective, you would realize that God has you in the palms of His hands.  He knows where you are, what you like, and what you don’t like.  Instead of living discontented, frustrated, always wishing you were somewhere else, embrace the place where you are.  See the good. Be grateful for what you have.”

My job is to help my coaching clients get what they want.  Each has a Big Goal, and I help them with the mindset tools, strategy and accountability that will enable them to reach that Big Goal, even if it seems far-fetched to someone else.

In my 16 years as a Personal Success Coach ™, I have learned that there are TWO fundamental keys to reaching any Big Goal:

1) Focus on what you WANT (not on what you don’t want). Keep your eyes on the prize and use mindset tools daily to strengthen your belief that you will get it.

2) Take ONE step at a time toward that outcome you want. Don’t try to figure out the whole HOW for getting there.  You can count on God/The Universe to help you with that, rolling the plan out for you one step at a time.  YOUR job is to take the step that is in front of you right NOW.  Looking too far ahead will only distract you from taking the right action today and make you doubt that it is possible to reach your Big Goal.  If you just stay in the NOW, focusing on carrying out today’s action step, the next step will come to you when the time is right.

A Case in Point

A week ago, on a coaching call, one of my clients seemed close to having a panic attack.  She was feeling totally overwhelmed by all the tasks she felt must be done simultaneously – caring for her family, staying mostly inside when she wanted to be outside, trying to come up with an entirely new distance learning curriculum for her students, while trying to consistently work her network marketing side business.  I understood why she wanted to stay in bed with the covers pulled over her head rather than try to organize ALL the many steps she needed to take!

During our call, we took a calm look at things and focused on what steps she could take NOW to begin to make progress on her tasks.  As we talked, she thought of some specific resources available to her that she hadn’t been utilizing, and she promised to take just ONE action as soon as we hung up: call her mentor teacher for lessons plan suggestions and emotional support.

She also came up with a brilliant plan for shaking off her paralyzing sense of overwhelm: She vowed to complete just ONE to THREE action items per day — no more, no less.  That number was mentally manageable to her, and she knew that she could prioritize that many items per day and get them done.  Completing them each day would give her a sense of control and accomplishment, which in turn would restore her self-confidence and expectation of success.

When we talked a week later, she sounded like her old can-do self again. She had been carrying out her daily “three things” action plan, and was feeling much better. She was getting up early and enjoying her daily walks with her dog again, and grateful to be able to spend more precious time with her family because she wasn’t away all day in the classroom.  She is embracing where she is” and being grateful for what she has in the PRESENT moment, just as Joel suggests.

We can all emulate my client’s simple approach to creating greater productivity and happiness:  Accept what is going on right NOW, do what we can right NOW, and let tomorrow’s steps unfold in God’s perfect time and way.  When we allow ourselves to be fully present in each moment, we will find joy in recognizing the many precious gifts that surround us right NOW.

PLEASE NOTE: The blog will be taking the next weekend off.  Your next Cup of Caroll will arrive on Sunday May 10. 

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled!*******************

I want to be of service to YOU, your friends, colleagues and loved ones, especially in this challenging time!  To schedule a NO-obligation F.R.E.E. HOUR of phone coaching that will help you clarify your goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

 

October 27, 2019

“The Law of Forced Efficiency says, ‘There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing.’” – Brian Tracy

This quote really rings true for me today.  It seems like my To-Do list gets longer each weekend, just when I long for some rejuvenating down time. (I did take a little of that last week, as you will recall from the “Fun Creates Success” blog, and it was glorious!)

I always have chores to do and errands to run on the weekends, and I usually spend at least a couple of hours on writing, editing and publishing the blog. There is always a good amount of paperwork and tasks to do for my coaching practice.  And today, on top of all that, I spent my morning attending a volunteer orientation to prepare for next Saturday’s big fundraiser for my favorite grassroots rescue organization, The Little Red Dog (www.thelittlereddog.com), where we have adopted two beloved four-footed family members.

I am sure you have your own very long To-Do list and can relate! The question we must ask ourselves is: “Where do I begin?”  How should you prioritize your To-Dos to make the best use of your time?

Brian Tracy is being a realist when he says that there is never enough time to do EVERYTHING you would like to accomplish. But as long as you focus on completing the MOST IMPORTANT tasks first – the ones that will make a real difference and get you closer to your own Big Goals – you will invariably go to bed each night feeling satisfied that you made the BEST possible use of your time and energy.

But HOW do you simplify your long To-Do list and choose the right things to focus on first? Here’s a helpful, simple approach that I found in a Walk The Talk daily email. I highly recommend signing up to receive your own free subscription at www.walkthetalk.com.

“The key to uncomplicating things in your life lies in increasing your ability to simplify and focus.  A first step toward simplifying and getting focused is to make a ‘let it go’ list.  Here are a few things to add to your list.  Let go of….

  • Waiting for someone else to fix it
  • Worrying about things over which you have no control
  • Trying to make something work that’s never going to
  • Wasting time with negative people
  • Hoping that the person causing a problem will miraculously change
  • Putting off the decision you know you should make right now
  • Dwelling on what’s wrong, rather than making it right.

So, what do YOU need to let go of?  Make a list, take action, and clear a space for you to get focused on what is truly important in your life.”

Amen!  This list is a great reminder that it’s not always what we DO, but sometimes what we consciously DON’T do, that can quickly bring us more ease, productivity, satisfaction and success!

PLEASE NOTE: The Blog is taking next weekend off so Rick and I can volunteer at The Little Red Dog’s Gala fundraiser to help them save more four-footed heroes who deserve a forever home.  Look for your next Cup of Caroll on Sunday, November 10.

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com TODAY!

 

 

 

August 18, 2019

“You are valuable because you exist.  Not because of what you do or what you have done, but simply because you are.” — Max Lucado, author and pastor

Today’s blog topic came to me from a conversation I had this week with a client who was having a mini-meltdown on our call over her perceived shortcomings when it came to being productive. This is the end of her summer, as she is preparing to resume teaching school next week.

She was beating herself up for watching too much TV and spending too much time on social media recently, when she believed she should have used every available minute of her final free time to build her network marketing business.

For most of the summer, she has had to deal with a series of complex family issues, principally, the unexpected serous illness of her parent. Other family members also needed her support with health and financial issues.  Nevertheless, she felt guilty for not doing and being “more” for the past couple of weeks.

I imagine she expected me to agree with her harsh self-assessment and give her an accountability lecture.  Instead, I surprised her by recommending that she lighten the mental and emotional burden she has placed on herself with a big ol’ dollop of grace and self-love.

Of course, I support playing full out for a Big Goal.  If you really, really want something – especially if it has a drop-dead deadline – you need to be willing to work smart every available minute and use every mindset and Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) tool available to help you succeed.  Playing full out demonstrates your commitment to your Big Goal and causes God/The Universe and your own subconscious mind to conspire together to give you a boost with the “How.”

But there’s a hidden danger if you are always running at breakneck speed from one goal to the next.  While reaching important short-term goals can require a full-out sprint for a limited period, achieving long-term success is more like running a marathon.  You have to pace yourself or you risk physical and emotional burnout, as I believe my client was experiencing.

Most importantly, you must always remember that you are not defined by your achievements.  You are valuable and worthy simply for being the unique and special person you are.

As a Personal Success Coach, my job is to help my clients get whatever they want in life.  The Big Goal they choose to pursue is up to them – greater prosperity, a fitter body, a loving relationship or a successful business.  Nobody, including me, can tell them what their heartfelt goals should be.  Nor should they put undue pressure on themselves to reach those goals at the expense of having life balance, fun and fulfillment.  If they become so driven to succeed that pursuing their Big Goal feels like a burden, I recommend taking a step back to examine their true motivation.

Many people have a strong “Why” for pursuing a goal, especially a financial goal.  One of my clients wants to succeed at her business so her mother can retire from her job.  Several want their spouses to be able to quit their jobs to pursue their dreams or spend more time with their family.  Some are motivated to financially support a cause they care deeply about. Those are all great reasons for consistently doing the daily activities that will get them closer to their goals with a sense of joy and enthusiasm.

But I have seen some people approach their daily tasks with a joyless, teeth-gritted, “this is hard, but I MUST do it” mindset and energy. I believe they are actually driven by the idea that they must prove their value through their achievements.  Their sense of self-worth depends on outer successes and the approval of others.

One of my clients recently shared a journaling she had done to explore her Limiting Belief that “If I give it my all and fail, my life has been a waste.”  This was her Ego’s internal worst case scenario about what might happen if she didn’t reach the level of success in her business that she wanted.  In the course of her self-exploration, she had the Ah-Ha Moment that she doesn’t remember her father saying “I love you” very often when she was growing up.  But she does remember him frequently saying, “I am so proud of you.”

Thus, her father’s pride in her accomplishments became her Ego’s path to “earning” the unconditional love she truly craved. She wrote, “I think this has sort of made me think that if I can’t do something that makes a splash, it’s not worth doing and certainly not worth talking about. So I find myself striving for that over-achiever status.  I feel like anything less is pointless and even something to feel shameful about, so I just don’t talk about it.”

Being human, I am sure each of us has felt at some time that we are not good enough. For some, it’s about their appearance:  “I’m not…young enough, pretty enough, thin enough…” to be worthy of receiving unconditional love and acceptance from those I care about.

For me and others, it’s about our performance: “I didn’t go to the gym.  I didn’t get an A.  I didn’t win the competition.  I didn’t put on the perfect birthday party for my child.”  Therefore, I suck.

The truth is, your inherent value doesn’t increase or decrease with age, beauty, fitness level, accomplishments, job productivity or salary.

As minister Joel Osteen, puts it, “You are the apple of God’s eye” simply because you exist. If you are alive on planet earth, you are enough.  In fact, you are PRICELESS.  Otherwise, you are claiming that only the pretty, thin, A Students, celebrities and sports stars are worthy of God’s love, their own self-love and the approval of people whose opinion matters. What about the rest of us, then?

As the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. so eloquently said, we should not be judged by the color of our skin, but by the content of our character.  He didn’t say we should be judged by our achievements either!

So if you long to take a little break from your pursuit of success to just float in the pool from time to time, do what your heart calls you to do.  When you are working, give it your 100% BEST…. And when you occasionally need to relax and recharge, allow yourself to REALLY enjoy and be fully present to it, without guilt or shame.  Schedule adequate time for both work and play and you CAN have it all.

I urge you to make this your daily mantra: I am not my job title or accomplishments.  I am whole, complete and perfect, just as I am. I am the apple of God’s eye and I am ENOUGH.”

IMPORTANT NOTE: The blog will be on vacation for the next two weekends while Rick and I relax and recharge ourselves with a little stay-cation.  A Cup of Caroll will return after Labor Day with a brand new post on Sunday, September 8.   I hope YOU enjoy the last sweet moments of summer with your loved ones too!

If you would like your own F.R.E.E. subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to http://practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top to enter your name and email.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help you clarify your Big Goals and get into ACTION on making them a reality, email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

August 4, 2019

 “I learned that we can do anything, but we can’t do everything…at least not at the same time. So think of your priorities not in terms of what activities you do, but when you do them. Timing is everything.” – Dan Millman in Stress is a Choice

 Having just finished my third annual Prosperity Summer Camp course at the end of July and taking on nine new private coaching clients in the past several weeks, I have been running hard all summer. While I am very grateful to be doing this fulfilling work for a living, I must admit to feeling a bit depleted physically and mentally right now.

Sitting here in my office on a beautiful summer afternoon, with a blog to write and a long to-do list of paperwork and chores to finish over the weekend, my thought just now was “My battery could really use some re-charging!”  Many of my readers who are consultants in the same network marketing company have just finished up an intense and exciting July. So, I thought maybe many of my cherished readers might relate to this topic now, too.  Here is a lightly-edited blog from several years ago:

April 26, 2015

“Dedicate yourself to the good you deserve and desire for yourself.  Give yourself peace of mind.  You deserve to be happy.  You deserve delight.” – Mark Victor Hansen

 You may recall that one of my suggestions for “How to Beat Burnout(see blog #188 if you missed it) was to take at least one full day off each week and one entire weekend off each month.

If you find it challenging to imagine creating that much “recharging” time for yourself, I understand.  It’s challenging for me too.  There always seems to be plenty of paperwork, errands and projects to tackle on the two days a week I don’t have coaching clients. But I am striving to walk my talk and take regular time off to rest and re-charge my mind, body and spirit so I can be a more effective Personal Success Coach for my clients, a more attentive and loving wife to my husband, and a happier, more fulfilled ME to myself.

No matter how diligently we try to keep up, the chores will always be there. Trust me, the world will keep spinning if you unplug from them for a few hours a week. Isn’t it more important to nurture yourself and your personal relationships than to have a spotless house or completely orderly office?

I’ve learned to prioritize and do the weekly “musts” like writing this blog first, and then if I also manage to knock off a couple of the “would be nice” chores each week, that’s a plus that makes me feel EVEN better.  What really makes me feel happy and balanced is spending a few hours each week reading, relaxing, enjoying good meals with my husband and watching good television. We also make it a point to go out on a weekly date night and enjoy a “Big Kids’ Play Day” once or twice a month with our annual passes to Disneyland.

Here are four specific suggestions that I know for certain will have a very positive effect on your personal relationships and your mental, emotional and physical well-being IF you follow them: 

Be fully present. “Haste makes waste,” is accurate. If you focus 100% of your attention on what you are doing, you will do a better job in less time. You may think regular multi-tasking is a time-saver, but it actually makes you chronically half-present in your life. You half-understand what you hear and read, and are emotionally half-present with the people you are with. If you aren’t giving your projects, conversations and reading your full attention, you will eventually miss something critical that will lead to misunderstanding and/or having to completely re-do a task. One of my clients was dismayed when her five-year-old child recently asked her, “Mommy, why are you always in a hurry?” It’s not the amount of time you spend with them, but the quality of your undivided attention, that makes your loved ones feel that you care about them.

Be mindful in your health habits. Obesity studies show that people who eat slowly and savor their food, instead of shoveling it in mindlessly while watching television or working at their desk, consistently consume fewer calories. Taking time to prepare dinner and eat it with your loved ones most evenings will benefit your family relationships, as well as your waistline. Similarly, in your exercise routine, if you do your running, Pilates, yoga poses or weight lifting mindfully with proper form, your muscles will respond faster and avoid injury.

Get enough sleep. The late evening hours when the kids are in bed may seem like the ONLY time you have to get your own tasks done or just collapse on the couch in front of the TV or on social media.  However the price of sleep deprivation is very high, including stubborn weight gain, emotional and mental stress and a compromised immune system. Falling asleep at the wheel or a tired driver’s slowed response time are now said to cause as many deadly accidents as drunk drivers.

If you discipline yourself to go to bed even 30 minutes earlier on weeknights, it will pay off in greater mental acuity, emotional control, and physical health. Back-lit screens like TV, computers and e-readers have been shown to interfere with your brain’s ability to wind down and let you fall asleep and stay asleep.  Exercising too close to bedtime can keep you awake too. Make the last 30-60 minutes of your evening a quiet time to meditate, converse with your partner or read an enjoyable paper book.

Unplug from your devices as often as possible. 84% of smart phone owners use their device while watching TV. Many people are tethered to electronics 24/7. “If you’re with your children and checking your phone all the time, the message to them is ‘Anyone in the world is more important than you,’” says Tanya Shevitz, a spokesperson for Reboot, a nonprofit organization dedicated to reinvigorating Jewish culture for a modern world.

Orthodox Jews refrain from business transactions, writing, driving, gardening, shopping, laundry and other tasks from sunset Friday to sunset Saturday, spending time focused on God and their loved ones. But you don’t have to unplug from the internet and your phone just for religious reasons. “Embracing the sensual pleasures of life – having a special meal, lighting candles, having conversations where we really listen to others and listen to what our souls are trying to say to us…is rejuvenating when we give ourselves a day of rest once a week,” Shevitz suggests.

If you commit to making even one small change in one or more of these areas and stick with it, you will begin to create a more balanced, healthy, happy and fulfilling life for yourself and those you love.

And don’t you deserve that delight?

IMPORTANT NOTE: In keeping with the message of this blog, A Cup of Caroll will be taking next weekend off and will return on Sunday August 18.

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at www.practicalprosperitycoach.com  and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top. Your name and email will be kept 100% confidential and will not be used by anyone else for any purpose.

 ****************** You Can Fulfill Your Dreams! ********************

 To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

 

 

 

February 10, 2019

Here is a lightly-edited version of the blog that followed last week’s blog in 2015. It has an equally important message for everyone who wants to effectively and joyfully pursue their Big Goals, whether personal or professional.

“In between goals is a thing called life that has to be lived and enjoyed.” – Sid Caesar

 Last week, I re-published a Fan Favorite blog that I wrote about a past client who had reached a very Big Goal in just 30 days because she applied three specific success principles:

  • Use all the tools available to you to their full advantage.
  • Be strategic (work smarter, not harder.)
  • Use every available minute.

Because she had a very big “Why” for reaching her goal and because 30 days was the specific amount of time she had to reach it, she committed to focusing and giving it everything she had for that short amount of time, even though she also had to maintain a demanding day job.

Her reward at the end of that intense effort was promoting to Director Level in her direct sales company, which enabled her to quit her 50-60 hour a week job and work her business on HER terms, so she could spend more time with her new husband and have the lifestyle freedom she had always dreamed of.  For her, that was a Big Goal worth pursuing with all her might.

Risking Burnout

Now, let’s examine the flip side of this: What happens if you get TOO consumed with pursuing a Big Goal that has a longer time frame than just a few months?  You are risking Burnout — depleting your emotional, mental and physical resources to the point of trying to drive to the finish line on an inner fuel tank that has run dry.

Burnout can bring some dire consequences:  The constant stress of pushing yourself hard and worrying about where you are in relation to a long-term Big Goal can lead to physical illness and/or emotional breakdown.  It can also alienate loved ones who feel you have abandoned them or that they are less important to you than your Big Goal.  Ironically, Burnout can lead you to abandon your Big Goal altogether, so that in the end, you have nothing to show for all the time and effort you put toward it.

Signs of Burnout

Another past client came to me after pursuing a business goal for several years with only modest success.  Every day, she beat herself up emotionally for not being where she thought she should be. She felt like a failure, despite recognizing that she hadn’t been given the proper training, support and resources during her first several years in the business. She had to figure it out by herself and actually did a pretty good job, yet, she couldn’t stop negatively comparing herself to colleagues who surpassed her results during that time.

She also beat herself up for the toll she felt her pursuit of success had taken on her family.  She had two wonderful school-aged children and a loving and financially successful husband, yet she believed they must feel resentful because she hadn’t spent all her time with them.  She admitted to neglecting herself, too, by allowing herself almost no Me time to replenish her physical and emotional reserves.

I coached her to begin treating her home-based business like a real “business” and set her office hours.  That way, she could focus on her business for a few hours during the day when her kids were at school and perhaps three nights a week she could spend an hour on it as well. The rest of the time, she should be taking care of her own well-being — including exercise, rest and relaxation, personal and spiritual development time– and spending precious time with her family every day.

Despite promising that she would work to find balance and act like she truly is her own boss, she came to our calls crying almost every week.  She just couldn’t let up on herself.  When she was with her family or doing something for herself, she kept thinking she should be working her business.  And when she was working her business, she felt guilty that she wasn’t taking care of herself and her family.

Since my job as a Personal Success Coach is to help my clients reach their Big Goals as quickly, easily and joyfully as possible, I realized after several months that we were not making progress, and so did she.  I recognized that she was showing signs of major Burnout, and was unable to put into practice the simple strategies and support I tried to give her. Finally, I warned her that if she stayed on her self-imposed “hamster wheel” of stress, she would inevitably have to quit her business altogether for the sake of her well-being. I recommended she seek professional help to regain a balanced view of herself and her life and that is what I believe she ultimately did.

How to Beat Burnout

When you are pursuing a long-term Big Goal, the same three principles apply that were followed by my client who reached her Big Goal in just 30 days. The key is the definition of using “every available minute.”  That does not mean “EVERY minute of your life”!  If you follow a daily schedule that balances work, play, spiritual and personal development, physical well-being, family time and Me time, you can use your available WORK time strategically by working smarter, not harder.

And, of course, I recommend that you learn to harness the power of the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) to reach your Big Goals with greater speed and ease by focusing your belief and channeling your own positive energy toward your Big Goal, which inevitably attracts the perfect people, resources and serendipitous breaks to you.

Here are the four Success Principles I believe will help you reach your long-term Big Goal with healthy balance and emotional fulfillment, instead of Burnout and tears:

Four Principles of Long-term Success

  • Treat your Big Goal like a Big Game, rather than a struggle for survival. Nobody, including you, is going to die if you don’t reach your goal by when you thought you would.  Remember you are PLAYING to win and you will win your Big Game by getting to the finish line feeling happy, healthy and fulfilled. Maintaining a centered, enthusiastic and positive energy each day will make others want to join you and help you win your Big Game.
  • Pace yourself to play the Long Game. Realize this is a marathon, not a sprint.  Focus on reaching a series of short-term goals within your Long Game and take time to celebrate those victories as milestones on the path to the finish line. If you don’t, the finish line can seem mighty far away.  Regularly acknowledge yourself and allow others to acknowledge you for the ground you have taken, instead of focusing on how far you have left to go.
  • Treat yourself as valuable and others will too. Make and follow a Daily Game Plan to give yourself whatever you need to fulfill your mental, spiritual, emotional and physical needs. Don’t try to play Superman or Superwoman and go it alone. Make clear, specific requests for whatever help you need.  Those who care for you will be happy to step up and support you, if you simply ASK.
  • Stay committed and maintain perspective. Don’t let the petty disappointments of today make you doubt that you will win your Long Game if you just keep on keeping on. Realize that the last “No” just brought you that much closer to the next “Yes.” If you truly want to beat Burnout, you must view your Big Goal as just one part of your life, not the all-consuming focus of your life.

Here’s my final suggestion for beating Burnout: Take at least ONE FULL DAY off each week and once a month, take the ENTIRE WEEKEND off to refresh, relax and rejuvenate your body and soul.  Plan fun activities and get-away trips with friends or family, instead of using the whole weekend to catch up on paperwork, run errands or tackle honey-do lists. You will return to the pursuit of your Big Game with renewed enthusiasm, greater productivity and enhanced creativity.

IMPORTANT NOTE:  The blog will be taking the next weekend off so I can enjoy President’s Day Weekend with my family!  This is one of the ways I avoid writer’s BurnoutA Cup of Caroll will return on Sunday February 24.

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer yourself or someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change your/their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching, with no obligation and no strings attached!  To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make this the BEST year yet, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

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