August 26, 2018

“In the end, it all comes down to a matter of choice.  Each of us can choose to be reactive and at the mercy of a world that appears threatening, or we can choose to be open to life and its remarkable possibilities.  We can be defensive and protective, or we can live with a new spring in our step and spirit, eyes that truly see, ears that really hear, and a heart that can feel the wonder and celebrate the magnificent mystery that is life.” – From the book Getting Unstuck: 10 Simple Secrets to Embracing Change and Celebrating Your Life

Like many of you, I have been watching the weather news anxiously this week as Hurricane Lane bore down on the beautiful Hawaiian Islands.  Although there has certainly been some significant damage to cars, homes and roads from high winds and buckets of rain, the force of the storm turned out to be much less than expected. Thankfully, the people living in the Islands have been spared the overwhelming chaos they could have faced.

The weather chaos reminds me of other forms of chaos that a number of my clients, friends and I have faced this week, as well.  Several had children going off to college for the first time, which I now know from experience (thanks to my stepson Matt), can be an anxious and challenging time, both physically and emotionally.  It was also back to school time for younger children, and there’s always a certain amount of chaos and jangled nerves that go with a new school year routine, especially if they are going into a new school. Others had mechanical problems with cars and home remodeling.  I personally had some truly frustrating moments with my email system, which I absolutely depend on to be able to coach my clients.

While it’s easy for your Ego to feel anxious, frustrated, upset and even despairing when faced with different forms of chaos, it’s important for you to not succumb to that negative energy.  If you give in to it, the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) dictates that focusing your energy on negative thoughts and emotions will only attract MORE chaos to you. Whatever thoughts and emotions we focus on gain strength, like a hurricane traveling across the warm waters of an ocean, sucking up more moisture and growing ever bigger and stronger.

Fortunately, you have a choice.  No circumstance or person can make you FEEL any particular way.  You don’t have to suck up negative energy and make yourself feel more negative, upset and frustrated.  You have the free will to CHOOSE exactly how you view and respond to any given situation.  You can be the “eye” of the hurricane, which is calm and peaceful in the midst of the chaos swirling around it.

How can you do that?  Your thoughts create your emotions.  By re-directing your thoughts, you can control your emotional reaction to any situation. If you are upset, frustrated, angry, despairing or panicked, it’s because you have focused your thoughts on the worst case scenario for the outcome of a situation.  You are expecting the WORST to happen.

Instead, you need to consciously direct your mind to expect THE BEST.  You can’t know for sure the ultimate outcome of any situation in advance.  The BEST outcome is just as likely as the WORST.  But your advantage is that you can influence the odds for either the BEST or the WORST outcome by the energy you direct toward one or the other.

Your subconscious mind is always listening to everything you think and say. Like an internal minion, it believes everything you tell it, hook, line and sinker.  So don’t tell it the WORST is going to happen….Tell it the BEST is going to happen!  Talk it into really EXPECTING the best and it will do everything in its power to come up with ideas for you to make the best outcome a reality.

I saw firsthand how a mindset shift influenced the outcome for one of my friends recently.  He emailed me that his car had just had yet ANOTHER mechanical issue, in the same week it had blown two tires and the transmission had gone out of whack. In his Ego’s initial “despair” reaction to this chaos, he fumed, “This is TOO MUCH!  Please pray for me!” Clearly, his Ego was envisioning the worst case scenario: “You can’t handle any more of this chaos. This is hopeless!  Your car is not going to function and you are going to be stuck without transportation!”

I replied that maybe this “bad news” was really a sign that he was supposed to get a new car – something EVEN better.  That got him thinking along a new track.  Instead of seeing himself as the victim of some sort of unfathomable divine punishment, he recognized and took responsibility for each thing that had gone wrong with it. Instead of seeing his car as something to be frustrated with, he realized he really loves his car!

As his thoughts ran in a new, positive direction, his energy began to shift.  He wrote:

“Here’s what I decided.  For now, I am completely focused on my mental health.  I want to be happy and I am….Right now I am at peace, certainly not financially but mentally.  I am liked.  I am loved.  I have the ability to give of myself and for now I need to simply maintain that.  Being here with what I have is OK for now. 

“I am outside looking at my car right now.  It’s 11 years old.  I know it like an old friend.  We’ve been through a lot together.  If someone gave me a new car, I’d have to break it in.  Good friends you hold onto.  I am not limiting myself and my future.  I am basking in the peace of the moment.”

He went from frustration and despair to “basking in the peace of the moment” in the time it took to look at his car and write an email about what it means to him.  THAT is some impressive energy shifting!

Just a little while later, I got a follow-up message:

“WOW!  Not sure if my statement earlier had anything to do with it but after sending the message about my car, I tried one more time to start it.  This time, there was a sound of actually trying to turn over. Then it did.  I discovered the positive cable wasn’t completely connected.  Like life.  We may think we are grounded but we can’t function with only negative.”

As soon as his mindset and energy shifted, his subconscious mind got him to try turning it on one more time and voila — He got a working battery without having to buy a new one!

To calm your thoughts and emotions, here’s a mantra I use myself whenever I can’t see the solution to a chaotic situation or tough problem.  If you prefer, you can substitute The Universe, Inner Wisdom, Infinite Spirit — or whatever description best fits your personal belief system:

“I claim, accept and expect THE BEST.  God is with me, helping me, and I EXPECT great things to happen!”

Repeating this affirmation aloud in the face of chaos will allow your subconscious mind to stay calm and open to receiving the BEST solution, as it is whispered to you by the still, small voice that dwells in the eye of the hurricane.

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****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help you clarify your Big Goals and get into ACTION on making them a reality, email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

“You’ll see it when you believe it.” – Wayne Dyer

As you will recall, last week’s blog was about using the powerful, enjoyable tool of visualization to create a vivid picture of something you want in your mind, as the first step toward making it a reality in your world. Children and adolescents use their imaginations like this naturally and frequently.

Have you ever found yourself staring out the window on a beautiful day, lost in happy thoughts about something you are looking forward to doing over the weekend? That “daydreaming” is a type of visualization. You can SEE vividly in your “mind’s eye” some fun activity you anticipate doing, while your body is actually sitting at your desk (possibly with a report due by 5:00 PM).

Of course, many of our daydreams never manifest because they are simple fantasies. Still, it’s fun to imagine yourself walking the red carpet, winning the lottery, or driving a red Ferrari! Nevertheless, some goals we visualize CAN become real, depending on the level of our commitment to having them. If you are willing to put your consistent FOCUS, BELIEF and ACTION into it, you can eventually reach it.

Visualizing is a very natural human activity and it is also the first step in turning a thought into an actual thing that is real in the material world. Thomas Edison reportedly failed to invent the light bulb 300 times before he succeeded. But as he kept imagining different possibilities, eventually his subconscious led him to create a version that would WORK in the real world.

Unfortunately, most of us have been taught not be gullible and easily fooled. We grew up with the Skeptic’s battle cry: “I’ll believe it when I see it!” But as Wayne Dyer asserts, the opposite is actually true: By BELIEVING you see it in your “mind’s eye” first through visualization, your subconscious mind is given the blueprint to help you eventually SEE it manifested in the “real” world.

Every Big Goal that is eventually reached must begin in the same place: Getting clear on what you WANT. You can’t take ACTION toward a goal unless God/The Universe and your own subconscious mind both know exactly what you want. One way to get clear is to describe the outcome you want as a positive affirmation. Think of an affirmation as an intention statement describing what you want to have.

Your affirmation/intention MUST be stated in the present tense, as though it is already real. In fact, it IS “real” now, in the sense that it exists in your imagination, just as the light bulb existed in Edison’s imagination first and then became a material prototype.

It’s not self-deluded to state what you want to have as though it’s already REAL – That’s what will cause your subconscious mind (which believes everything you tell it) to start cranking up your imagination and creativity so you can take the actions to invent that light bulb or get that red sports car!

One of my clients has been in a tough financial situation for many years. She is the sole custodian and sole support of two special-needs children who require most of her time and energy beyond what she gives to her demanding job. Her salary barely covers their necessities, with little left over for “luxuries” like new clothes for herself.

Given her present reality, I have tremendous respect for her willingness to try to imagine something different for her life. Right now, she doesn’t appear to have any options open to her for creating significantly more financial prosperity, yet she is willing to state each day what she WANTS, as though it is her reality NOW. We created an affirmation for her to support this NEW reality: “I receive regular, reliable financial support based on my instrinsic value, in addition to what I do, and I am SO grateful!”

When she says that affirmation aloud daily, she gives her subconscious mind and God/The Universe a clear blueprint for what she wants. The more vividly she SEES and FEELS that to be true in her subconscious mind, the faster it will bring her the means to make it real.

A meaningful example of unexpected abundance came to her quickly after she began saying this affirmation. Every year, her company puts on a black-tie Holiday party for the staff and every year, she feels chagrined to be wearing an inexpensive or re-purposed dress, rather than a fancy cocktail dress like the other women. This year, she focused solely on what she WANTED, which was to feel beautifully dressed and confident at the party.

Her birthday was a couple of weeks before the big soiree, and out of the blue, a friend sent her a gift check that was exactly enough to buy herself a beautiful cocktail dress (on sale for the Holidays, of course!), matching shoes and earrings. She sent me a picture of herself taken at the party in her lovely outfit, glowing and radiating a beautiful smile.

That manifestation was just the start of many financial windfalls and unexpected help that have come to her since. Last week, she courageously asked her boss for a raise, laying out a strong case for her value to the company and the considerable responsibilities that have been added to her position over the past year. Even after saying, “We hadn’t planned on giving anyone a raise this year,” the boss promised to consider her request carefully.

Affirming (stating) and visualizing her value, my client believes she has a good chance of getting a much-needed raise. However, as she now has real-world evidence to believe, even if she doesn’t, God/The Universe and her subconscious mind will conspire together to come up with another route to her prosperity.

She knows that the HOW doesn’t matter. She already BELIEVES her prosperity is growing – and soon she will SEE it in her checkbook!

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching! It is absolutely F*R*E*E* of charge, with no obligation and no strings attached! And if YOU haven’t coached with me in awhile and would like a “tune up” session please give yourself this gift! 

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make this the BEST year yet, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or 888-503-8145.