April 30, 2023

“As long as you’re only focused on YOU, you’re not going to be fulfilled. The next level of your destiny is connected to helping someone else.” – Joel Osteen

One of our Women’s Manifesting Mastermind members recently posed a fascinating question: “How do you maintain your energy and enthusiasm for life as you grow older?” 

The group came up with a wide variety of suggestions, including getting involved in a physical activity such as yoga, pilates or pickleball; learning a new skill or taking up a hobby, as one member recently discovered a real talent for creating pottery; widening your circle of friends or seeking a new romantic mate; exploring new types of cultural events; and finding a new mid-life career or side gig.

These are all great ideas, but I believe there is one sure-fire answer for both men and women of any age. A guaranteed way to regain a zest for life and feel purposeful is highlighted in a YouTube talk by my favorite positive-thinking pastor, Joel Osteen, titled “Living Cause Driven.”

Joel says, “You were created to help someone else.  You need to have a cause you’re passionate about.  If you’re only focused on yourself, you won’t reach your highest potential.”

A few ways he suggested to do this: volunteer, mentor, support worthy organizations or help one individual get what they need.

Joel went on to say, “Get involved in making a difference.  When you’re cause-driven, you’ll see promotion, doors open, the right people show up.

“It’s good to have your dreams, your goals, but you need to be a part of something bigger than just you.  When your dream is connected to helping others, you’re not only helping them; you’re helping yourself…. You can’t help others without God helping you… The greatness God put in you is going to come out of the cause.”

It’s good to raise your family, do good work on your job, give to charity, help a friend when they need support.  But when you apply your unique gifts and abilities to a CAUSE – a problem that needs to be solved or an injustice you want to see righted – it brings out the BEST in you and often pushes you past whatever self-imposed limits you may have. You will stay focused and persevere when you face seemingly-insurmountable odds or opposition.  You will get up and get going when you feel like staying on the couch because the cause is worth it.

That extra drive we have when we are pursuing a cause bigger than ourselves was beautifully demonstrated in the story of the Jeansonne Family that was the subject of the last blog (You Brought the Blessing – Blog 468).  Many of my cherished readers and I donated to the “Be Love Days” fundraising campaign that was the brainstorm of one of my favorite past clients, Andrea Schaff, and her dear friend, Kristy Jeansonne. Kristy’s husband Brian was diagnosed with ALS on April 14, 2020 and as his condition has progressed, he has required professional caregiving, which is a big out-of-pocket expense not covered by insurance.

Kristy told Andrea she was not sure how they would survive if they had to come up with an extra $110,000 a year for Brian’s care, so they brainstormed together and came up with the idea of asking everyone they knew to donate $14 (or more) on April 14, 2023 AND to spread the word to 10 or more personal contacts.  Within days, over 1250 individual donations had rolled in, amounting to over $118,000 and still climbing.

All this happened because two women were Cause-Driven and didn’t let anything stop them.  Now, they and a group of volunteers plan to make it an annual event. I have a strong feeling it is going to grow into something much BIGGER than even they can now imagine, spreading beyond the worthy Jeansonne Family.

Another one of my longtime coaching clients, Diane, tragically had her son Kevin Natale pass away of cancer at the age of 44 last year. She told me she now has a new passion for growing her direct sales business because she has a new “Why” beyond just making extra money for a comfortable retirement: She wants to help many more people with her skin care products and business opportunity so she can carry on the work of the Founded on Forgiveness Foundation Kevin started.

Kevin’s foundation is dedicated to spreading forgiveness because he learned first-hand how forgiveness changed his life when he was finally able to forgive the man who shot and paralyzed him when he was just 14 years old.  Thousands of others who have heard Kevin’s story have been inspired to forgive the “unforgiveable” too.

Now that Diane is inspired by a cause bigger than herself, she isn’t stopped by fatigue or fear of rejection.  She gets up and gets after it each day because she wants her son’s memory to live on and his story to change thousands and thousands of lives far into the future.

As for me, about a year ago, I became a volunteer daily dog walker for six rescue pups that are fostered by The Little Red Dog, a local grassroots rescue that saves dogs shelters would ordinarily euthanize because of the breed (pit bulls, chihuahuas, etc.), injuries, disabilities or just fear and shyness making them difficult to adopt.

I am not an experienced dog walker by any means, but I have learned a lot from other volunteers who are.  It’s a joy to see the dogs come out of their shell and respond to kindness and gentle but firm direction.  It’s such an honor to be someone they can count on to show up and to believe they will find a forever home eventually.

The most impactful personal “cause” I had was my very first walking assignment: “Rhino,” an aptly-named gray pit bull mix, overweight at about 65 pounds, super strong and sometimes overly-enthusiastic.

Rhino is sweet with people, but was fearful of other dogs, which made him behave aggressively as a defense tactic.  When there were no other dogs around, he was placid.  But if he spotted another dog, he would go nuts. Once, when a small white dog barked at him from behind a wrought iron gate, Rhino charged, pulling me off my feet, and dragging me on my stomach across the lawn until I was finally able to put the brakes on him.

Not surprisingly, TLRD had fostered Rhino for several years.  He was adopted and returned three times by people who instantly gave up on him.  I finally asked TLRD co-founder Steve McClain if Rhino could be taken temporarily out of his foster home with an elderly couple who gave him love but no discipline so he could be re-trained by a professional.

Steve told me he would love to, but even if a trainer re-habilitated him (which wouldn’t be hard), if he went back to the same foster situation, it would all be for nothing without consistent reinforcement.

So I continued to walk and believe in Rhino and I literally prayed for a “Christmas Miracle” that he would be adopted by a couple with no dogs who could give him the training and patience and love he needed.  Within two weeks, Steve got a call from a couple whose adopted dog had just passed, asking if TLRD had any “hard to place” dogs because they were up for the challenge.  Because I had talked to Steve, I believe, he suggested Rhino and they took him on.

Rhino now lives in a great home and seems like a completely different pup.  He has lost weight, and looks happy and relaxed doing various fun activities and living the life he deserves on his Instagram page at rhino.daug.

Rhino was my #1 cause within the bigger cause of supporting animal rescue, and I will always think of him whenever something looks “hopeless.” He proved that miracles really CAN happen when we just keep believing, do the best we can, and leave the HOW up to God.

Joel Osteen says when you live cause-driven, “You’ll go beyond what you think you’re capable of.  You go beyond the ordinary into the uncommon.” And I promise it will infuse your life with a new energy, joie de vivre and sense of purpose and fulfillment beyond what you can now imagine.  Beyond pickleball even!

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next weekend off to celebrate Rick’s and my 16th wedding anniversary. Look for your next Cup of Caroll on May 14, and I hope you will celebrate those heroes who deserve recognition EVERY day: Teacher Appreciation Week is May 8-12!

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