A Cup of Caroll

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” – Winston Churchill

My wonderful husband Rick and I had a great time with our dear friends on our very special Disney vacation in Orlando. Many thanks to all my clients, friends and readers who sent me warm wishes for safe travels and fun on our journey!

We enjoyed amazing food and beverages from around the world at Epcot’s 20^th annual International Food and Wine Festival and had a blast watching the Indiana Jones stunt show at Disney’s Hollywood Studios. Most of all, we loved quietly watching the giraffes, zebras, gnus and other African animals roaming and grazing right below our hotel balcony in Kadani Village. We won’t ever forget the eight zebras racing around the savannah at top speed, mock-biting and kicking each other while vying for “King of the Savannah” status or the two adorable baby gorillas play wrestling just like human toddlers in the Animal Kingdom park.

Still, I couldn’t help comparing the rides and attractions in Florida to those in our beloved local Disneyland and California Adventure parks. The humidity is definitely much better here in Southern California and the Magic Kingdom’s versions of our favorite rides like Pirates of the Caribbean and the Haunted Mansion were just not as good, in our opinion.

But in one key area, Florida’s Disney World has it over California, hands-down. The staff members here are invariably cordial, polite and professional. But we were consistently impressed that ALL the “Cast Members” we encountered in Florida Disney’s transportation services, hotels, parks and restaurants went above and beyond in their ability to make us feel like treasured “Guests,” rather than just customers.

Having spent a number of years working in the hospitality industry, I know how hard service staff work, so I always reward good service generously. But the level of service we encountered from the Florida crew blew us away. Each driver, hostess, custodian, hotel staff member, park attendant and server took time to look us in the eye, smile, ask where we were from and learn something personal about us. This connection felt genuine – like they truly cared about us and our experience, not just their tips. Many of them shared something personal about their own background and tastes, which made us relate to them as individuals, not just service providers.

Needless to say, the tips we gave them were above and beyond too! At one upscale restaurant, we made a point of bringing our friends back for a second dinner, and specifically asked to be seated in our delightful server Kiera’s section. She was surprised and pleased to see us again and mentioned some details she remembered from our earlier visit, which showed she really had paid attention. We left her a big tip, a glowing evaluation and Rick is now emailing her some of his favorite Holiday recipes.

This got me thinking about what customer service really means. Whether they are teachers, mortgage officers, realtors, lawyers, performing artists, marketing professionals, independent network marketing consultants or coaches, ALL of my clients have customers they serve. But I don’t think all of them fully realize how vital it is to genuinely connect with those we serve, rather than simply delivering the expected level of customer “satisfaction.”

The difference between good and GREAT service lies in our ability to connect at a personal level and show others that we truly care about them as individuals. Those who truly love people seem to naturally excel at this. I am sure that Disney doesn’t just train their employees; they PICK their employees for this inherent trait and then teach them how to demonstrate it to their customers.

I believe the ability to connect from the heart must be mindfully nurtured on a daily basis by all of us who are in service to others. I strive to teach my clients to see the world through the eyes of their customer or potential customer – to focus on “How can I give them what THEY need?” rather than “How can I get what I need from them?” The great motivational speaker Zig Ziglar was famous for his axiom, “You will get whatever YOU want by helping enough people get what THEY want.”

It doesn’t take long or require much effort to get into someone else’s world and uncover their heartfelt desires. Simply take a few precious moments to connect with them at a personal level. Be curious. Ask good questions, actively listen and be genuinely interested in discovering who they are and what they want. Be caring. Ask what you can do to support them in getting their needs met. Be grateful. Acknowledge them for their special qualities and for all the good they bring into your life. When you do these simple things you will be delivering not just good service but “Massive Value,” as Tony Robbins calls it.

Connecting from your heart with others will make you feel great AND make you Priceless to them…And that will invariably bring you what YOU want, too!

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching! It is absolutely F*R*E*E* of charge, with no obligation and no strings attached! And if YOU haven’t coached with me in awhile and would like a “tune up” session please give yourself this gift!

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make this the BEST year yet, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or call toll-free 888-503-8145.

October 11, 2015

When you read this, I will already be winging my way to Orlando with my wonderful husband, Rick, where we will spend a week enjoying every part of the Magic Kingdom from our dear friends’ Disney Vacation Club villa in the Animal Kingdom, followed by a few days sightseeing in the Florida Keys. Both of these destinations have been on my bucket list for decades, so I am thrilled to have this opportunity to visit them in one trip.

Due to my extended time away, A Cup of Caroll will take next Sunday off. But in the meantime, I want to give both my new and faithful longtime readers the chance to enjoy/enjoy again this slightly-edited post that was originally published two years ago:

November 3, 2013

“Circumstances are beyond human control, but our conduct is in our own power.” — Benjamin Disraeli

When I heard from two clients in the space of an hour this morning, both with the same complaint, I felt a nudge from God/The Universe to write about this topic.

Both of these women are good people who always strive to do the right thing and to treat others with kindness and respect. They deserve only the BEST in life. But no matter how good we are, we will sometimes be treated badly by others. One was upset because her soon-to-be ex-boss had made a snide comment to her, insinuating she was being less than productive during her final week at work. The other was hurt that her mother had unjustly accused her in front of other family members of not being supportive during a family crisis.

I let them vent, and then I asked them both, “What difference does what they said make in YOUR life?” The answer both gave was “Nothing.” Nothing unkind that is said to or about them can impede their happiness or ability to reach their goals. And, in each case, their nemesis was behaving in a way that was totally consistent with who they had shown themselves to be over a long period of time. In other words, they were just being themselves. Not their highest selves, but they were acting according to how their Egos see the world.

It’s not our job to change other people. Constant, fear-based scarcity thinking is its own punishment. These people are living under a cloud of constant suspicion, resentment, anger, blame, and self-imposed victimhood. Because they expect the worst from others and, as the Law of Attraction states, energy attracts like energy, they must inevitably attract negative people and situations into their lives. By recognizing that they are creating their own hellish self-fulfilling prophecy, we can forgive them — or at least have compassion for them.

It is not how others treat us, but the way we respond to how they treat us that determines what is attracted next into our lives. Nobody and nothing outside of you has the power to make you feel bad. How we feel is entirely our choice — an internal response to an external situation. If you allow someone’s words or deeds to upset you, “the terrorists win.”

I know how frustrating and hurtful it can be to be unjustly accused of something. But in the grand scheme things, what others think of us is none of our business. They have a right to their opinion, and if it is petty, flawed, or just plain mean, that’s their loss, not ours. For the most part, the folks they are gossiping to about us are well aware of this, and most don’t buy into it. Those who have their own interactions with you will judge you on their personal experience of you, not on malicious gossip.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean that you should be a doormat. If someone does something that harms you in a material way — slandering you on a job reference, withholding money owed to you, lying about you in court, etc. — such actions must be answered directly with the truth. And, as I’ve seen time and again, the truth ALWAYS comes out eventually.

One of my clients was taken to court by her ex-husband, who accused her of hiding a huge income that she didn’t really make, in an attempt to get his child support payments reduced.   In fact, he claimed that she should have to pay HIM child support, even though she had primary custody of their children.

At first, she was incensed that she was being falsely accused and that she had to expend a great deal of time, trouble and expense defending herself in court. I coached her to let go of all resentment towards him and to focus solely on maintaining positive energy and putting together solid proof of her true income for the judge. Since the truth was on her side, I helped her steadily grow her faith and expect The Best — that everything would ultimately be resolved in her favor.

She was able to remain calm, get the expert help she needed, and triumph in court. In fact, not only was the case against her dismissed, but the judge substantially INCREASED the amount of child support her ex-husband was paying her and ordered him to pay all back child support he owed, as well as half of her attorney fees.

When faced with unfair treatment, the rule of thumb we can use is this: If there is something you need to do to protect your own material interests, then DO it, without generating negative emotion about the person or situation. And, if there is nothing you can do about it, then simply re-focus your attention toward what you want for YOUR life.

Where attention goes, energy flows. So stay focused on what you WANT and allow others to learn their own Life Lessons and reap their own karma. Living well, as they say, is the best revenge.

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching! It is absolutely F*R*E*E* of charge, with no obligation and no strings attached! And if YOU haven’t coached with me in awhile and would like a “tune up” session please give yourself this gift!

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make this the BEST year yet, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or call toll-free 888-503-8145.

“Triumph often is nearest when defeat seems inescapable.” – B.C. Forbes

I recently heard another inspiring televised sermon by Joel Osteen on a thought-provoking topic. He was urging each of us to be a “Nevertheless Person.”

It starts with recognizing a challenging situation you face for what it is. You may have lost a promotion or a job, you could be in great financial distress, facing a dire medical diagnosis or despairing of ever finding your perfect mate. You don’t deny what’s so. Things do appear to be stacked against you, yet you are able to declare with conviction, “Nevertheless, I am going to triumph.”

Joel gave a vivid illustration from the Bible of what it means to be a Nevertheless Person in the story of David and Goliath. David faced his people’s enemy, Goliath, an experienced warrior described as a “giant,” while David was a teenager whose only life experience was herding his father’s sheep. Goliath had protective armor and weapons, while David had only a slingshot and five smooth stones.

But David didn’t see his situation the way the Vegas odds-makers would. He recognized that he was outmatched in many ways. Nevertheless, he was willing to fight Goliath because that is what God told him to do. David said, “If God be for me, who can be against me?” With God on his side, the odds didn’t matter to him. David believed wholeheartedly that if he did everything he was able to do to the very BEST of his ability, he would still triumph.

And of course, he did.   David’s slingshot landed one stone right in the middle of Goliath’s forehead and brought his enemy crashing to the ground. And we all know where David’s destiny led him: By trusting and following God’s word, the young shepherd eventually was promoted to be the ruler of his people. What odds would Vegas have given that, do you think?

When you are a Nevertheless Person, you don’t deny what’s so, but your expectations aren’t limited by what appears “likely” to happen. If it is humanly possible to do something, then it is possible for YOU to do it — especially when you believe God/The Universe actively guides and supports you. I believe the Master Manifesters who assert that the single greatest tool we have been given by God/the Universe to help us create everything we want is The Law of Attraction, which states “energy attracts like energy.”

You can’t always control your circumstances and you definitely can’t control other people.   But you CAN control your own beliefs, thoughts and emotions – and those are what create your “energy.”   The energy you send out is going to draw back to you the people and resources who are in alignment with your energy, and they can help you triumph, despite long odds.

During a complimentary coaching session this week, I was blessed to meet a very inspiring Nevertheless Person. “Martha” was SO excited and grateful to have an hour of coaching with me, it was almost embarrassing. While I was uncertain how much I could do for her in just one short hour, I soon realized that she was 100% committed to taking advantage of EVERY form of assistance God sends her, and I guess she saw me as part of God’s Care Package.

She was consistently positive and upbeat as she shared a little bit about the many serious challenges she has faced in her young life. She was born premature and contracted a debilitating health condition at a young age that flares up whenever she over-stresses her body. It can put her in pain and in bed when it flares up, so she has to be careful to get enough rest and limit her work hours.

She worked too hard at a previous 80-hour-a-week job and her condition flared up, so she had to quit that well-paying position and move back in with her parents. She went back to school to train for a teaching career, but it just couldn’t pay the bills. So Martha reluctantly had to take a fairly low-paying job, but before long, the company downsized and let her go.

Her parents, while very supportive, have their own financial struggles. Martha really wants to give them the retirement they deserve, so rather than taking another low wage job, she made the bold decision to devote herself 100% to growing her fledgling network marketing business. “I was making a good amount doing it part-time just 10 hours a week,” she told me, “so I decided to see what I could do in 40 hours a week.”

To do this, she had to put all her possessions in storage and move away from her family to another state. She is currently living as a temporary houseguest of her business mentor, who is giving her intensive training and support to help her grow her business rapidly. With the guidance of her skilled mentor, Martha is determined to take her business to new heights in record time.

She devoured The Power by Rhonda Byrne, which I recommend to all my clients. It’s one of the very best training manuals for putting the Law of Attraction into action in daily life. And she has been eagerly using one of the key tools I taught her, a self-coaching affirmation that begins, “I claim, accept and expect the Best from myself and others 100% of the time.” She repeats it aloud constantly, especially before every call to invite someone to purchase her products or consider becoming her business partner. She truly is expecting the BEST and she is getting it.

Martha promoted from a “Level One” to a “Level Five” Consultant – a big leap — in a few short months. She now has 19 business partners in her organization, eleven of them personally sponsored by her. “Most of them are serious, solid business builders, like me,” she says. (There’s the Law of Attraction at work again!) Her monthly commission check is growing quickly.

Even more amazing, Martha recently got the last seat on a plane to fly her to the network marketing company’s annual convention and found herself sitting next to an attractive young man. They took an immediate shine to each other and talked throughout the trip. He is planning to come visit her soon. “For years, I have been asking God every day to please send me my perfect mate” and now she just may have God’s answer.

On our call, I gave Martha my authentic encouragement and acknowledgment that she is embodying the right positive energy and taking all the right actions to help her reach her Big Goals. Still, I don’t think I did as much for Martha as she did for me. She showed me what it looks like to face down some of life’s biggest challenges and declare, “Nevertheless, I WILL triumph.”

****************** The Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

I invite you to offer someone you care about a truly unique gift that can change their life — ONE HOUR of Personal Success Coaching! It is absolutely F*R*E*E* of charge, with no obligation and no strings attached! And if YOU haven’t coached with me in awhile and would like a “tune up” session please give yourself this gift!

To schedule a F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make this the BEST year yet, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com or call toll-free 888-503-8145.