Tame Your Tongue – Blog 502

April 28, 2024

“Our words are setting the direction for our lives.  If you want to know what you’re going to be like five years from now, listen to what you’re saying about yourself today….Are you sending your words out in the direction you want your life to go?” – Joel Osteen

No matter your age, gender, race, physical attributes or socio-economic status, know that your words have immense power – for good and for bad. In that, we are all equal.

And how often do we turn our words against our own selves?  My favorite positive-thought pastor, Joel Osteen, says that when you speak about yourself today, you are “prophesying your future.  You can’t speak defeat and have victory.  You can’t talk sickness and have health.  You can’t speak lack and struggle and have abundance….Pay attention to what you’re saying about yourself, your family, your finances, and your health.  You’re going to become what you’re continually saying.

“Quit saying negative things about yourself.  Be as respectful to yourself as you are to others. You should be your best encourager. Compliment yourself more than you do anyone else. You can’t love others if you don’t love yourself.”

Psychologists totally agree with this.  That’s because your subconscious mind takes everything you say very literally and believes that whatever you state as a fact is TRUE.

This is great news! It means that you can talk yourself into living below your potential by speaking out limitations such as, “I’ll never get well.  I’ll never succeed.  I’ll never be prosperous. I’ll never meet the right person. I am not qualified for my dream job.”

AND it also means that when you speak ALOUD positive visions for your life, you are setting your subconscious mind to work figuring out how to make those positive declarations a reality:

“I have seeds of greatness in me. I am destined to leave my mark in this life.”

“This is MY time! Things are about to change in my favor. A shift is coming. New doors are opening for me right NOW.  I am just one phone call away from my destiny.”

I am blessed, I am surrounded by favor and good things are about to happen to me!”

And, of course, what you say to others about themselves can help or hurt them, too. How many young people’s lives have been limited by an authority figure telling them they were “slow” or wouldn’t amount to much, or should color inside the lines and not try to stand out as “different” from the norm?

And how many other (fortunate) children have been inspired to EXCEL beyond what their circumstances might have predicted was possible for them by the kind and supportive words of a parent, teacher, pastor, scout leader, tutor, friend or role model who took an interest and spoke a vision of victory to them?

You can’t stop negative thoughts from coming into your head, but when you speak them ALOUD, you give them life. Let negative thoughts die stillborn.  Guard your tongue and speak out only words of positivity, encouragement and victory if you want to live a victorious life.

Each of us has immense power to direct our own life and to help others to steer theirs in a positive direction through the power of our WORDS.  If we choose them carefully and speak only empowering words over ourselves and others, what a wonderful world it would be!

IMPORTANT NOTE: The blog is taking next weekend off to celebrate Rick’s and my 17th wedding anniversary and will return on Sunday May 12.

COACHING RESULTS

“When I started coaching with Caroll, I truly didn’t believe I was worthy of success. I self-sabotaged and listened to the voices in my head telling me it wasn’t even worthy trying. Now, I sincerely believe that I have something to offer and am deserving of the success I want in my life.” – Catherine B., direct sales Leader

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

Give a friend, colleague or yourself a unique gift that can be truly life-changing: a ONE HOUR Success Breakthrough session by phone.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no strings attached! To schedule this F*R*E*E* coaching session, email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com ASAP, as space is VERY limited.

If you would like your own F*R*E*E* subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website https://practicalprosperitycoach.com and fill in your name and email at the top.

 

Watch Your Words – Blog 430

April 3, 2022

“Our words are setting the direction for our lives.  If you want to know what you’re going to be like five years from now, listen to what you’re saying about yourself today….Are you sending your words out in the direction you want your life to go?” – Joel Osteen

No matter your age, gender, race, physical attributes or socio-economic status, know that your words have immense power – for good and for bad. In that, we are all equal.

If you doubt that, you have to look no further than the Chris Rock/Will Smith fiasco at the Oscars that has embroiled all of Hollywood and far beyond in some major drama.  And it all started because of a handful of words Chris Rock ad-libbed, without giving much thought to the impact they might have on the person he was speaking to and about.

I am convinced that Rock didn’t know that Jada Pinkett Smith’s head was shaved because she was suffering from alopecia, an auto-immune condition, often caused by severe stress, that causes baldness, primarily in women. It must be very emotionally painful for anyone, but most especially someone whose beauty is part of her career identity. He may well have thought she shaved her head for an acting role and that his joke was “harmless.” As far as I have heard, he has yet to apologize to her.

But regardless, teasing someone and/or inviting others to laugh at any aspect of their appearance should be off limits. Isn’t it really an act of bullying?  Yet, many in the audience, including Will Smith initially, laughed at the “joke.” Would it have been funny if it were said by a boss to an employee in a staff meeting? By a high school teacher to a girl in his class?

I am not taking sides here – Will Smith has since expressed great remorse and apologized, stating that his act of violence against Chris Rock was “inexcusable,” which it certainly was.

My point is that the genesis of this whole mess, which has consumed much of the news cycle for the past week (even while innocent people are still dying in Ukraine and many other BIG problems require our full attention), all started with some poorly-thought-out WORDS.  That is a testament to their power to cause harm. But thank goodness, our words have an equally great power to do good!

And how often do we turn our words against our own selves?  My favorite positive-thought pastor, Joel Osteen, says that when you speak about yourself today, you are “prophesying your future.  You can’t speak defeat and have victory.  You can’t talk sickness and have health.  You can’t speak lack and struggle and have abundance….Pay attention to what you’re saying about yourself, your family, your finances, and your health.  You’re going to become what you’re continually saying.”

Psychologists totally agree with this.  That’s because your subconscious mind takes everything you say very literally and believes that whatever you state as a fact is TRUE.

This is great news! It means that you can talk yourself into living below your potential by speaking limitations to yourself such as “I’ll never get well.  I’ll never succeed.  I’ll never be prosperous. I’ll never meet the right person.” AND it also means that when you speak aloud positive visions for your life, you are setting your subconscious mind to work figuring out how to make those positive declarations a reality.

And, of course, what you say to others about themselves can help or hurt them, too. How many young people’s lives have been limited by an authority figure telling them they were “slow” or wouldn’t amount to much, or should color inside the lines and not try to stand out as “different” from the norm?

And how many other (fortunate) children have been inspired to EXCEL beyond what their circumstances might have predicted was possible for them by the kind and supportive words of a parent, a teacher, a scout leader, a tutor, a role model who took an interest and spoke a vision of victory to them?

Each of us has immense power to direct our own life and to help others to steer theirs in a positive direction through the power of our WORDS.  If we choose them carefully and speak only empowering words over ourselves and others, what a wonderful world it could be!

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next weekend off and will return on Sunday, April 17. 

COACHING RESULTS

“When I started coaching with Caroll, I truly didn’t believe I was worthy of success. I self-sabotaged and listened to the voices in my head telling me it wasn’t even worth trying. Now, I sincerely believe that I have something to offer and am deserving of the success I want in my life.” – Catherine B., direct sales Leader

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

Give a friend, colleague or yourself a unique gift that can be truly life-changing: a ONE HOUR Success Breakthrough session by phone.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no strings attached! To schedule this F*R*E*E* coaching session, email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com ASAP, as space is VERY limited this month.

If you would like your own F*R*E*E* subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website https://practicalprosperitycoach.com and fill in your name and email at the top.

 

Encouragement Does More – Blog 404

May 16, 2021

“Correction does much, but encouragement does more.” – Johann Wofgang von Goethe

It’s been another one of those acrimonious weeks in Washington, D.C. with lots of mudslinging and snide tweets between political parties and even within parties. Just what is it they are trying to accomplish, we might wonder?  Have our “public servants” completely forgotten what it was that We the People sent them there to DO: help our country thrive and our citizens live better lives?  Seems so sometimes.

I think most of us find it depressing and distressing that people in all walks of life these days seem to have lost the will to compromise, be civil and work together for their mutual interests. Many, but thank goodness, not ALL people.

Whenever I get frustrated about the state of human relations, it always helps if I re-focus my attention on the many, many MORE people on this planet who are working hard on positive things to benefit mankind.  Quietly, with dedication and drive, they go about their work as scientists, medical professionals, front-line workers, teachers, animal rescuers, social workers, gardeners, salespeople, stay-at-home moms, etc., solving problems and making their world better. Sadly, we never seem to acknowledge or thank them enough for that.

From time to time, it is inevitable that we all will have conflicts or disagreements with others. But we must remember that their different political affiliation, beliefs or opinions don’t make them a “bad” person or an “enemy.” If whatever we focus on expands and grows stronger (and it does), then we MUST focus on the GOOD in others if we want to have productive, mutually-beneficial personal and professional relationships. As the Law of Attraction says, the energy (our thoughts plus our emotions) that we put forth always attracts back to us matching energy.

One of the recent inspirational emails I receive daily from Joel Osteen reminds us that we can create much happier, more productive relationships if we focus on others’ positive qualities and use encouraging words whenever we speak to them:

Sharpen Each Other by Joel Osteen

“This principle is true in relationships: If you see the good in your spouse, your children, and your friends, focusing on their strengths and praising them for what you like about them, that will draw out more good and improve your relationship.  People improve when you praise them for their good qualities.  Your spouse can have a hundred good qualities, but if you focus on the three things you don’t like, it will drive a wedge between the two of you.

“If you overlook the things you don’t like and focus on the things you do like, it will change the atmosphere in your home.  God put you together so you would sharpen each other. Don’t use your iron to say hurtful words that cut like a knife or use your iron to try to hammer out all the flaws.  The way you sharpen them is by praising them for what you like, encouraging them in what they’re good at, and cheering them on for what they’re doing right.  Be a voice that pushes forward.”

So the next time you are tempted to be critical of your family member, student, team leader or member, friend, neighbor, or anyone else, simply pause first and turn your attention to their GOOD qualities.  Then, if you absolutely must deliver some useful feedback or correction, be sure to do it in a way that clearly shows kindness and your respect for them.  And even MORE often, whenever you see something praiseworthy in them, be sure to speak up and acknowledge them for it. That will surely create a relationship that “sharpens” you both in the best possible way.

COACHING RESULTS

“When I started coaching with Caroll, I truly didn’t believe I was worthy of success.  I self-sabotaged and listened to the voices in my head telling me it wasn’t even worth trying.  Now, I sincerely believe that I have something to offer and am deserving of the success I want in my life.” – Catherine B., direct sales leader

I want to be of service to YOU and your friends, colleagues and loved ones!  To schedule a F*R*E*E* no-obligation one-hour Success Breakthrough Session by phone that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION on making them a reality, please email me while I still have openings at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this Cup of Caroll blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and enter your email to request your “Free Weekly Prosperity Tips” at the top.

 

Get on the Energy Bus – Blog 393

January 24, 2021

“You are where you are today in part because of what you’ve been saying….Words are like seeds.  When you speak something out, you give life to what you’re saying.  If you continue to say it, eventually that can become a reality.” – Joel Osteen

Well, 2021 certainly has started off with a bang, hasn’t it?  Some things bad, some things good.  Much of it out of our individual control. But there are two very crucial things that affect your own success and quality of life that are always under your direct control: your attitude and your words.  How you think and how you convey those thoughts to others can make all the difference in how your future turns out.

Since many of my readers are either direct sales leaders, entrepreneurs or team leaders at their work, I want to share a simple recipe for success in leading a team. Even if you aren’t a boss or team leader, you are undoubtedly part of a team in some area of life – your class, your family, your social circle, volunteer organization or church.  Rarely do we succeed in life all alone.  We need other people – many other people – to help us and we to help them too, as we all strive to reach our Big Goals.

This recipe for success shows us how to adopt the right attitude and – most importantly – how to convey it to others on our team in a way that will inspire, uplift and encourage them to believe in themselves and to want to be their best.

This simple recipe comes from an entertaining little book one of my coaching clients generously gifted me called The Energy Bus by Jon Gordon. It’s the story of how a very unhappy marketing manager named George learns how to become a great team leader from the driver and passengers on a bus he is forced to take to work when his car is in the shop.  George’s family life is a shambles, his kids don’t like him and his wife is threatening divorce. And his department team members don’t much like him either. They do the bare minimum and won’t work cohesively as a team. George has just two weeks to pull his marketing team together to create a successful new product launch for his corporate bosses or he will be fired.

This short book is an easy read, but it contains some very practical ideas for nurturing and improving the happiness and effectiveness of our family, personal and business relationships by getting the important people in our lives to want to ride with us on our “Energy Bus.”

We’re the “bus driver” of our Energy Bus and they are our “passengers.”  We can’t MAKE them ride with us, we can only inspire them to want to get on board with our vision and CHOOSE to ride with us. The idea is that when we are all riding on the same bus, moving in the same direction, there’s nothing we cannot accomplish together.

Here is an excerpt from The Energy Bus by Jon Gordon, edited slightly for length:

“Five Ways to Love Your Passengers

“1. Make Time for Them – When you love someone or something, you spend time with them. You nurture your relationship with them. You can’t nurture business relationships sitting at your desk, just as you can’t spend quality time with your spouse if you are watching television. So the key is to come out of your office and get to know your team.  Spend time with them. Get to know them individually. Get to know them as people, not numbers. Just as you would tend to a garden, you need to cultivate your team with love. And while you are with them it is important to be present with them.  Be engaged in the present moment. Don’t be thinking about 10 things you have to do that day or the 10 other people you need to meet with.  Really be with that person and focus your energy on them. They will feel the difference.

“2. Listen to Them – One of the most important factors that determines a high management approval rating is whether the manager listens to the employee.  Does the manager hear what the employee has to say? Does the manager listen to the ideas and needs of the employee?  Your employees and customers just want to be heard, so listen to them and hear them…Empathy is the key….For instance, when you ask someone how they are doing, an easy way to show you are listening is to actually wait for the answer and make eye contact.

“3. Recognize Them – We don’t mean with trophies or some awards dinner.  We want you to make it real personal. Honor them for who they are and what they do. Recognize them as a person as much as a business professional. One leader we know sends each employee a personal birthday card with a handwritten note, not some electronic fake signature but a real note…Another very powerful way to recognize them is to praise them when they are doing things right. The more you recognize them for doing things right, the more they will do things right.

“4. Serve Them – A great leader once said, the higher you get in an organization, the more it is your duty to serve the people below you rather than having the people below serve you. The key is to serve their growth, their future, their career, and their spirits so they enjoy work, life and being on your bus. The more you serve their growth, the more they will help you grow.

“5. Bring Out the Best in Them – We saved this one for last because this is the most important. When you love someone you want the best for them. You want them to be successful and happy. You want to bring out the best in them. Thus the best way any leader can demonstrate their love for their team is to help each person discover their strengths and provide an opportunity for that person to utilize them. When you create a system that provides a way for your people to shine, you not only bring out the best in them, but in the rest of the team and company as well.  If you really want to love your team, help them do what they do best.”

Well, it won’t be much of a spoiler to tell you that George learns to live by this recipe for success and his wife and children begin to feel he loves them and they love him back. And his work team realizes he really cares about them and wants them to succeed and they begin to step up and contribute and shine and create a bang-up marketing presentation and everyone wins!

I believe I generally do follow these precepts with my family and coaching clients, but I know I can always do better. Starting NOW, I am going to re-read these five rules each morning during my personal development time to remind me to make sure they know that I genuinely do love them!

If you will do the same with the team in your life, I can promise that you will see some success miracles unfold for all of you, just like they did for George.

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next week off.  Look for your next fresh Cup of Caroll on Sunday February 7. 

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website https://practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

Start the year off right and give a friend, colleague or yourself a truly unique gift that can be truly life-changing: a private ONE HOUR “Prosperity Breakthrough” session with me.  It is absolutely F*R*E*E* with no strings attached! To schedule this F*R*E*E* phone coaching session, email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com ASAP, as I book up fast!

 

The Power of Encouragement – Blog 385

October 25, 2020

This week has been one of those.  I have scrambled hourly to help my wonderful husband acclimate to being home after his back surgery three weeks ago, followed by 10 days in a skilled nursing facility to help him regain the strength to walk on his own.  He finally was strong enough to come home with a walker on Friday the 16th.

Since then, every day has been a whirlwind of activity for me, as now I am not only looking after his needs, but also doing all the chores he used to happily do, including grocery shopping and cooking. (Yes, lucky me, Rick has fixed every dinner I have had for the past 13 years of our married life!) I am doing OK at it, with my “kitchen coach” sitting a few feet away in the family room.  But it’s a task I am not used to, and therefore stressful.

I am pleased to report that Rick has made HUGE progress since coming home and faithfully doing the many exercises his physical therapist has given him.  He now scoots around the house with his walker, leaving me more time to get my own work done and serve my clients.

I will write about the very important life lessons I have gleaned from this experience in a future blog, but for now, I am busy catching up with a lot of accountabilities. So I want to share with you the following “fan favorite” blog I originally wrote in 2016 that holds an important reminder for all of us, especially in these contentious and stressful times.  I hope you enjoy it (again)!

July 31, 2016

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” – Leo F. Buscaglia

One of my favorite free daily quote services is WalkTheTalk.com. I highly recommend subscribing to this F*R*E*E daily dose of good news and inspiration. Today’s post contained a link to a beautiful, inspiring short video about the power of acknowledgment, which I provided at the end of the blog.

A startling statistic is that 25% of good employees who voluntarily leave their jobs cite lack of appreciation as the reason they quit.  Can you imagine? What were their bosses thinking?!

I learned the secret a long time ago, which this video reinforces, that every human being craves appreciation. We all want to be seen, known and validated for who we are.  If you want to experience the great feeling of rapport, affinity and harmony with another human being – a Team member, boss, spouse, co-worker, in-law, etc. — give them a sincere acknowledgment, expressing appreciation for what they have done or simply who they are being.  You will make an instant friend.

Today, I got a lovely acknowledgment from someone who told me exactly how my coaching had made a difference for her and it touched me deeply.  I had done a complimentary coaching session with her over a year ago.  Now, even the greatest coach can’t turn someone’s life around in just one hour, but ALL of us can listen closely to someone, validate them, encourage them, and leave them loving themselves and believing in themselves just a little bit more.

During our long-ago hour together, I listened closely to what she shared about her difficult circumstances, and acknowledged her for her will to triumph in the face of the adversity she had been through – for never giving up. I also suggested she read The Power by Rhonda Byrne and check out professional therapy to help her begin to turn around a bad situation and create the life she deserved.  Lastly, I told her the door was always open to call me again anytime.

I didn’t hear from her for another year and a half.  Today, we had a follow-up session and to my absolute delight, I discovered that her life has completely transformed since we last spoke.  She is now ready to take her life to another level, and we are going to partner in coaching to do just that.

While I am thrilled to have her as a client, that wasn’t the best part of the call for me.  The best part was at the end, when she said, “I want to acknowledge YOU, Caroll.  My life has come so far since our session over a year ago.  What you recommended worked great for me.  My new career, my health, strength and my happy family all have come out of that!  Things are really falling into place for me and I know I’m on my way.  You are a blessing in my life!”

Do you think that made my day?  Heck it made my MONTH!  It was amazing to think that I had made such a big difference for another human being, simply by listening to her, acknowledging her, and telling her I believed in her. That’s what we coaches live for!  

And that’s why at the start of every coaching call, I always ask my clients to tell me what they are most proud of and want to be acknowledged for at that moment.  At first, it can be embarrassing, even painful, for some people to claim their worth out loud.  But, after a few more sessions, if we ever get too far into the call before I ask, even those who always squirm the most will interrupt me with, “Hey, aren’t you going to ask me what I want to be acknowledged for?”

I urge you to make at least one other human being’s day EVERY day by acknowledging and appreciating them. It will make them – and you — feel wonderful! (For extra credit, try it on someone who is usually negative or grumpy and see what happens!)

I will leave you with this wonderful post from my favorite positive-thought preacher, Joel Osteen, who is known for encouraging people to believe that more GOOD is on its way to them and their BEST days are still ahead:

“When you see someone who is struggling, a coworker who is discouraged, a friend who is not up to par, how do you respond?  Our words can be what keep a person going; our compliments can put a spring back in their step.  Now more than ever, we need to automatically let the encouragement flow.  We need to tell others how much we love them, how we value them, and tell them that they are talented and creative.  Always remember, with your words you carry life-giving water.  You carry hope, healing, encouragement and new beginnings, and you can pour it out everywhere you go.  Today, choose to speak encouragement.  Choose to speak victory and faith into others’ lives.  Instead of telling people what they’re doing wrong, instead of pointing out all their faults, find what they are doing right.  Focus on the good.  There are already enough critical, judgmental people in the world.  Let’s be people who lift others up and restore them.”

P.S. Watch this four-minute video on the importance of acknowledging and appreciating others. Copy and paste it into your browser, turn the sound up and I hope it makes YOUR day, too: http://www.flickspire.com/m/WalkTheTalk/WhileYouCan

PLEASE NOTE: The blog will be taking next weekend off so I can catch up further!  Enjoy a Happy Halloween and look for your next fresh Cup of Caroll on Sunday, November 8, 2020.  

If you would like your own F*R*E*E* subscription to receive A Cup of Caroll three Sundays a month, just go to my website at www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.  Your name and email will be kept 100% confidential and will not be used by anyone else for any other purpose.

****************** Fulfill Your Dreams! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help you clarify your Big Goals and get into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

What Are You Communicating? – Blog 379

August 16, 2020

I am attending a virtual convention all this weekend, so I hope you will enjoy this lightly-edited blog from one year ago that my readers found very useful. It outlines some great communication practices that are guaranteed to foster success in your career or business.

“Think of one person in your world you’ve been meaning to connect with: to get to know better or to actually make time for.  Surprise them: write them a note, find time to talk, or tell them about something that made you think of them.  Ask them about something they enjoy, and find out why they like it….” – From the book The Happiness Hack

Honest, thoughtful, effective communication creates the foundation for fulfilling, lasting personal and business relationships.  Those bonds, in turn, become the foundation for our success in life. And whether you realize it or not, people really DO notice how you behave when you communicate (or don’t) and judge you by your actions.

Over my sixteen years of Personal Success Coaching, I have witnessed a number of less-than-optimal communication “manners” among my clients that I know can limit their success. So want to share with you, too, a few practical tips for making your own communication habits more effective and enjoyable:

• Give them your undivided attention. When I coach, I sit at my desk, listening intently and taking notes about what my clients are saying, occasionally taking a sip of water (as quietly as possible) when my throat gets dry. Most of them give me their undivided attention, too.  But over the years, I have heard some clients banging pots and pans, running water, dragging furniture, chewing gum (or food) and slurping beverages. I often wonder if they do the same things while talking to their customers, colleagues and loved ones. The message this sends to your conversation partner is that “You are not important enough to me to give you my undivided attention.”  So please don’t multi-task while you are on the phone. (And PLEASE don’t be looking at or on your phone in the presence of someone you are supposed to be paying attention to – including your kids!)
• Don’t avoid a conversation. Many of my clients are used to texting or messaging their friends, customers and prospects. Rarely do they pick up the phone, even if the conversation is likely to have extended back and forth question and answers. If you want to speak to someone, CALL them and leave a voice mail if they don’t pick up.  In this text-happy world, leaving a voice message conveys to your listener that they matter SO much to you that you actually wanted to have a real conversation them! One of my clients who took my advice to CALL her prospects reported that the ratio of replies she got was triple what her texts had always garnered.  REMINDER: texting is to be avoided at all costs when you have a complicated or difficult situation to work through with someone.  One of my clients had a minor issue blow up into a huge dramatic to-do because she tried to handle it via text instead of talking it out with the other party.  Your positive energy rubs off on others when you use your VOICE, not typed words on a screen.
• Answer messages promptly. Do unto others what you would have them do unto you. If you want your teammates, customers, prospects and loved ones to return YOUR messages, ask yourself how promptly YOU respond to emails, texts and voice mails. Many of my clients complain about lack of response from others, but when I send them an urgent or critical email, I have learned to put PLEASE RESPOND in capital letters in the subject line – and some of them still never answer. Causing other people to wonder and worry about whether you got their message or something is wrong between you will not make them enjoy communicating with you.  Is your voice mailbox full?  Do you have a week’s worth of emails or 20 texts you haven’t looked at?  If you don’t respond to others in a timely manner, the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) dictates that others won’t respond to YOU.
• Keep your word. This is the #1 MUST for effective communication.  If you made an appointment to meet someone at Starbucks and then just didn’t show up, you can imagine how they will react!  Is it any less of an affront if you stand them up for a phone appointment they planned on and made time for?  As soon as you realize that you are running late or can’t make it, CALL or at least text them.  They will forgive you if you apologize and give a BRIEF explanation (not a rambling, self-serving excuse). But if they call and you are just not there, they will get the message loud and clear that they don’t matter much to you.
• Be clear and concise. Don’t beat around the bush with long preambles or let yourself wander off on tangents containing lots of details that are not important to your central message.  Trying to follow your meandering thoughts while waiting for you to get to the point, wears out your listener and assures they will tune you out and just pretend to be listening.  A tell-tale sign that you are inserting too many inconsequential details into your speaking is if you regularly interrupt yourself with “Well, anyway….” Or “Long story short….”  My favorite reminder to stick to the point comes from my friend and mentor Leslie Zann, a talented speaker and ace trainer for the direct sales industry.  Leslie always teaches, “If it’s not necessary to say, it’s necessary NOT to say it.”

I hope these communication tips will help you to create relationships built on mutual trust, honesty and respect. Those are bonds that last and will bring you rich rewards!

If you or your friends would like your own F*R*E*E* subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top to enter your name and email.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* hour of phone coaching that will help you clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com today.

 

Follow That Urge – Blog 367

March 29, 2020

 “There is more to us than we know.  If we can be made to see it, perhaps for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less.” – Kurt Hahn

On my “social distancing” morning walk a few days ago, it occurred to me that because of the creative power of our spoken WORDS, what we repeat ALOUD often manifests very literally. For example:

Moms: “I wish I could spend more time with my kids.”

Teachers: “I wish the school year would hurry up and end.”

Harried workers: “I wish I didn’t have to go in to work today.”

Me: “I wish Disneyland wasn’t so crowded!”

LOL, right?  We got what we wished for, just not in the way we thought.  (And NO, I don’t think individual requests like these can cause a global pandemic!)

Nevertheless, our habitually repeated words CAN become reality for us individually – for good and for not so good.  That’s because the subconscious mind is always listening to what we SAY and it takes everything very literally.  Therefore, it’s always a good idea to think carefully before you speak because by the creative power of your words, “thoughts become things” in your world.

The method and timing (the “How”) for delivering what we ask for, I believe, originates with God/The Universe. If what you ask for isn’t in alignment with your highest good, God/The Universe will block it. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t get something you want.  Believe that it wasn’t the best thing for you and God/The Universe is going to direct you to something even better.

But if your heartfelt desire IS good for you and doesn’t harm anyone else, you can trust that the Divine Plan for manifesting what you ASK for will make sure it comes to you at the perfect time, in the perfect way. Your subconscious mind is like a receiving dish that channels the Divine Mind’s messages into your conscious mind in the form of an unexplained urge to go somewhere or do something, an inventive, inspired thought or a deeply buried memory that suddenly surfaces. If you pay attention and ACT on those Divine nudges, they will lead you to the ideal “How” to fulfill your desire.

This past week, I had a very unexpected “How” manifest one of my own Big Goals. I want to share it with you, in hopes it will remind you to actively, daily use the unlimited power of your creative WORDS, in partnership with God/The Universe and your subconscious mind, to manifest everything you want and need.

For the past two months, I have been writing a letter to God first thing each morning, asking for my husband’s real estate and my coaching businesses to grow and flourish, and then reading the letter ALOUD with a feeling of gratitude. The key to the effectiveness of this method of manifesting — which comes straight from The Gratitude Formula, by May McCarthy — is expressing gratitude IN ADVANCE, which convinces your subconscious mind that it is already a done deal for you.

I first journal and then declare OUT LOUD, “Dear God, I am so grateful that on or before March 31, 2020, I have eight or more new or returning coaching clients and my business is prospering.  We have all the money we need to cover all our expenses, wants and desires.”

Reading ALOUD the gratitude statement for what you want plants it deeply into your subconscious mind and sets the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) to work on your behalf, attracting the right people, resources, breaks and inspiration to you. Then, as the book teaches, you simply wait and pay attention for God/The Universe to send you a “lead” (or leads) that could turn into the “How,” once you ACT on them.

By mid-March, I was delighted that, by following each “lead” I got, I had easily connected to six new or returning clients. Those six were a huge gift, and I was very grateful.  But then things stalled, as people were understandably reluctant to make financial commitments with so much uncertainty about the economy right now.  Each prospective new client would say, “As soon as this crazy time is over, I will definitely coach with you.”

Recently, I got a letter from Joel Osteen Ministries, requesting a financial donation to help them reach their March 31 fiscal year-end goal so they could continue their good work of giving hope to people around the world.  (Interesting, isn’t it, that his financial deadline was the same as mine for manifesting the last two clients I wanted?)

Over the past several years, I have gotten SO much clarity and belief from watching Joel Osteen’s uplifting messages, which always remind me that with God’s help, ANYTHING is possible, no matter how far-fetched the goal might seem. I have made a few small donations in the past and really wanted to send him a bigger “thank you,” but now didn’t seem like the right time.  Yet, over several days, the thought kept coming into my mind at odd moments to “Send Joel Osteen $100.”

Try as I might, I just couldn’t seem to throw away the donation card and envelope.  I looked at it every day, thinking, “I am so grateful to Joel for his positive messages. Nobody has helped me more to stay in faith and expect that God’s will for me is GOOD, especially in these scary times.  But I don’t see how I can make that size donation, with the lower income I am expecting over the next few months.”

Finally, the “inner urge” was so strong, I spontaneously wrote his ministry a check for $100 and dropped it in the mailbox before I could get cold feet. It made no sense to my rational mind, but that strong inner urge was prodding me, and I thought it just might be one of God’s “leads” to bring me what I needed. Almost instantly, a sense of peace came over me, convincing me that somehow my gift was going to lead to something good for me, too.

A few days later, out of the blue, I got an email from PayPal, stating that they had “pro-actively” decided to NOT deduct a business loan pay-back amount from my account for at least the next 30 days – representing almost $1,000 worth of income I wouldn’t need to cover the loan payback.  I had received back about 10 times what I had given in faith that it would somehow be covered!  In this perfect example of a “lead” straight out of The Gratitude Formula playbook, I got an “urge” and I followed it in faith, even when I didn’t know exactly what it meant.

As it turned out, that was just the beginning of my generous payback for following Divine instructions!  I got another “lead” from a business article that said many creditors are now helping their customers the way PayPal had.  So, I decided to reach out and ASK two other creditors and they instantly agreed to suspend all payments through June, with no interest penalty and no effect on my credit scores.  Altogether, I will save $2,000 each month through June, which means that I won’t need as much income as I had thought to cover my bills. The answer to my need wasn’t what my conscious mind had figured out. Instead, God/The Universe answered my Gratitude-in-Advance request in a much different way, but the outcome was just as good.

Even more importantly, this manifestation proved to me once and for all that The Gratitude Formula really does work.  If we ASK our Spiritual Source OUT LOUD for what we want, believing and feeling grateful, like it’s already done, then WAIT patiently for Divine directions to come to us for the “How”, our heartfelt desires WILL manifest.

I hope you will follow your inner urges and sudden inspirations. They are undoubtedly your subconscious mind trying to make you pay attention to what a much BIGGER Mind wants to guide you to, which is MORE than you dreamed was possible!

IMPORTANT NOTES: The blog will take next Sunday off and return with a new Cup of Caroll on Sunday April 12.  In the meantime, stay safe and healthy and expect The Best!

Also, if you haven’t yet checked out Leslie Zann’s Facebook Live Outrageous Achievement series, you really must!  She gives her unique input to help us design our new lives in “home stay” mode.  It will lift your spirits and give you great ideas for prospering during this challenging time. Her 15-30 minute live presentations on mindset, skill set, viewpoint, courage and open mic are all at 7:00am Monday-Friday for five weeks at www.facebook.com/lesliezannconsulting. (Of course, if you are not an early riser, you can watch the recordings later, as well.)

If you or your friends would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

*************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ******************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.

 

The Moves You Make – Blog 354

November 10, 2019

“There are generations yet unborn whose very lives will be shifted and shaped by the moves you make and the actions you take today.  And tomorrow.  And the next day.  And the next. Your life and what you do with it matters forever.” –from The Butterfly Effect by Andy Andrews

This quote struck me as very appropriate for Veterans Day Weekend, because those who serve our country and the sacrifices that they and their loved ones voluntarily make surely have a huge impact on generations to come.  We can never adequately thank them nor repay the debt we owe them, but we must try.

And for the rest of us, this quote also applies.  Maybe you don’t think of the things you do in your daily life as having an impact on generations yet unborn, but each and every one of us makes a difference in the days we spend on this earth.

I recently read two different short excerpts about integrity from Eric Harvey’s “The Leadership Solution” published by WalkTheTalk.com, a great free daily blog you may want to subscribe to if you are interested in leadership and building a cohesive, successful team or organization.

I wanted to share them with you because they remind me of the honor, courage and commitment exemplified by the men and women who serve in uniform.

 “Here is an ETHICAL ACTION TEST for you to use from the bestseller Ethics 4 Everyone: The Handbook for Integrity-Based Business Practices by Eric Harvey and Scott Airitam

1. Is it legal?
2. Does it comply with our rules and guidelines?
3. Is it in-sync with our organizational values?
4. Will I be comfortable and guilt free if I do it?
5. Does it match our stated commitments and guarantees?
6. Would I do it to my family and friends?
7. Would I be perfectly OK with someone doing it to me?
8. Would the most ethical person I know do it?

Answering “NO” to one or more of these would suggest the need to develop an alternative strategy or seek counsel and advice from appropriate sources.  Lead well.  Lead right.”

The second excerpt is from the new Start Right…Stay Right employee handbook that you can use to remind your Team members (and yourself) of the importance of keeping their commitments:

“Trustworthy, dependable, reliable.  What do these words describe to you?  Would others say that your word is your bond?  Successful people in life and at work place a premium on keeping their promises and commitments.  If they say they’ll do something, they DO it! They count on the fact that people can count on them.  And, they understand that statements like ‘I was gonna, or I mean to, or I haven’t forgotten’ all translate the same way: I JUST DIDN’T DO IT!  Those are just lame excuses, so they are close to meaningless.

Most of the time, we DO intend to keep ‘our word’ and promises, but good intentions only take you so far. You get no ‘points’ for developing the expectation; you only get ‘points’ when you deliver.

So don’t make promises lightly.  When you do make commitments to your manager, your co-worker, or your customer [or Team members], do what it takes to make good on them. Those people are depending on you. Those people are expecting you to keep your word.  Your reputation is at stake, and your success at work and in life is on the line.” – Eric Harvey

I would add that keeping your word to your family and friends is just as critical as it is in your job or business.  You can’t create lasting success and prosperity in ANY area of life if you do not live with integrity in EVERY area of life – especially with yourself.  If you break your word to yourself (e.g. not going to the gym, breaking your diet, blowing off those prospecting calls), you will soon learn that you cannot trust yourself.  And that is the beginning of the end of your self-esteem and self-confidence.

But if we hold ourselves to living by these clear, simple integrity guidelines, we, too, can aspire to make a positive impact on the world, each of us in our own unique and priceless way.

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com TODAY!

 

It Takes Character – Blog 351

October 6, 2019

“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” – Dale Carnegie

I got a huge reader response to the last blog (Use Your Superpower – Blog 350) about ways you can control your own MINDSET in dealing with negative people and situations that we all face from time to time.

The message essentially was: When you maintain a positive energy and do the right thing, the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) will work on your behalf to produce a positive outcome for you and everyone involved, no matter how difficult a situation may appear to be.  Even people who seem permanently locked into negative patterns can change their thoughts and behavior when YOU change your thinking and expectations about them.

This past week, two coaching clients shared their personal examples of this phenomenon, which I now pass along to you, in hopes their experiences will inspire you to use YOUR Superpower too.

The first client has an ailing mother who has required a lot of care from my client and her siblings.  The sister who lives farthest away has not helped share the burden of Mom’s care, either physically, emotionally or financially, and my client was feeling resigned and resentful that there seemed to be nothing she could do about it.

But when she decided to work on her OWN attitude toward her sister, things “miraculously” changed.  My client consciously held positive thoughts towards and expressed gratitude for her sister, wishing her only the BEST.  Soon, her sister surprised the family with a visit and spent a lot of time with their mother, which delighted Mom. She also pitched in with her care, so her siblings could take a much-needed break. What amazed my client most was that there was only positive energy among all the siblings while they were under the same roof.  “They usually butt heads, but there was no conflict, only harmony, while she was here.  I was amazed,” said my client. “I put on a positive mindset and it made a difference.” 

The second client posted a picture on social media of herself with friends at a joyful gathering, which garnered many positive comments. But she was blindsided by a harshly critical message from her own mother about her choice of wardrobe.  This was typical of how her mother has criticized her since childhood about any detail of her life that wasn’t in alignment with her mother’s rigid opinions of “right” and “wrong.”

My client took some time to think before she replied.  She resisted her Ego’s first inclination to lash out after feeling attacked.  Instead of choosing to feel hurt, offended and defensive, she worked on trying to understand her mother’s motivation. Regardless of how bluntly her mother delivered her criticisms, she knew deep down that her mother only intended to help her be successful and well-regarded by society.

When she replied, my client simply thanked her mother for caring about her and always wanting what is best for her.

Then it was her mother’s turn to be caught off guard!  She wrote back that she was surprised and very pleased at how “maturely” and “graciously” her daughter had received the “feedback.” This is the hidden blessing that my client discovered wrapped inside of this negative incident: She knows that her mother may never change, but she will never again allow herself to feel “less than” when her mother shares her personal opinions with her.

As my clients so wonderfully demonstrated, your mindset and energy (your thoughts plus the emotions those thoughts conjure up) constitute a very powerful force – a SUPERPOWER, in fact!  We are all born with it….We just have to consciously choose to use it for our benefit and the benefit of everyone whose paths we cross.

PLEASE NOTE: The blog is taking next week off for some Fall fun in Apple Country!  A Cup of Caroll will re-appear in your inbox on Sunday October 20. 

If you would like your own free subscription to receive this blog three Sundays a month, just go to my website at https://www.practicalprosperitycoach.com and click on the Prosperity Tips button at the top.

****************** Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled! ********************

To schedule a no-obligation F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help clarify your Big Goals and get you into ACTION to make them a reality, please email me at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com TODAY!

 

 

Great Communication Practices – Blog 349

September 15, 2019

“Think of one person in your world you’ve been meaning to connect with: to get to know better or to actually make time for.  Surprise them: write them a note, find time to talk, or tell them about something that made you think of them.  Ask them about something they enjoy, and find out why they like it….” – From the book The Happiness Hack

Honest, thoughtful, clear communication creates the foundation for fulfilling, lasting personal and business relationships.  Those bonds, in turn, become the foundation for our success in life. And whether you realize it or not, people really DO notice how you behave when you communicate (or don’t) and judge you by your words AND actions.

Over my fifteen years of coaching, I have witnessed a number of less-than-optimal communication “manners” among my clients that I know can limit their success. So want to share with you, too, a few practical tips for making your own communication habits more effective, successful and enjoyable:

• Give them your undivided attention. When I coach, I sit at my desk, listening intently and taking notes about what my clients are saying, occasionally taking a sip of water (as quietly as possible) when my throat gets dry. Most of them give me their undivided attention, too.  But over the years, I have heard some clients banging pots and pans, running water, dragging furniture, chewing gum (or food) and slurping beverages. I often wonder if they do the same things while talking to their customers, colleagues and loved ones. The message this sends to your conversation partner is that “You are not important enough to me to give you my undivided attention.”  So please don’t multi-task while you are on the phone. (And PLEASE don’t be looking at or on your phone in the presence of someone you are supposed to be paying attention to – including your kids!)
• Don’t avoid a conversation. Many of my clients are used to texting or messaging their friends, customers and prospects. Rarely do they pick up the phone, even if the conversation is likely to have extended back and forth questions and answers. If you want to speak to someone, CALL them and leave a voice mail if they don’t pick up.  In this text-happy world, leaving a voice message conveys to your listener that they matter SO much to you that you actually wanted to have a real conversation them! One of my clients who took my advice to CALL her prospects reported that the ratio of replies she got was triple what her texts had always garnered.  REMINDER: texting is to be avoided at all costs when you have a complicated or difficult situation to work through with someone.  One of my clients had a minor issue blow up into a huge dramatic to-do because she tried to handle it via text instead of talking it out with the other party.  Your positive energy rubs off on others when you use your VOICE, not typed words on a screen.
• Answer messages promptly. Do unto others what you would have them do unto you. If you want your teammates, customers, prospects and loved ones to return YOUR messages, ask yourself how promptly YOU respond to emails, texts and voice mails. Many of my clients complain about lack of response from others, but when I send them an urgent or critical email, I have learned to put PLEASE RESPOND in capital letters in the subject line – and some of them still never answer. Causing other people to wonder and worry about whether you got their message or something is wrong between you will not make them enjoy communicating with you.  Is your voice mailbox full?  Do you have a week’s worth of emails or 20 texts you haven’t looked at?  If you don’t respond to others in a timely manner, the Law of Attraction (“energy attracts like energy”) dictates that others will not respond to YOU.
• Keep your word. This is the #1 MUST for effective communication.  If you made an appointment to meet someone at Starbucks and then just didn’t show up, you can imagine how they will react!  Is it any less of an affront if you stand them up for a phone appointment they planned on and made time for?  As soon as you realize that you are running late or can’t make it, CALL or at least text them.  They will forgive you if you apologize and give a BRIEF explanation (not a rambling, self-serving excuse). But if they call and you are just not there, they will get the message loud and clear that they don’t matter much to you.
• Be clear and concise. Don’t beat around the bush with a long preamble or let yourself wander off on tangents containing lots of details that are not important to your central message.  Trying to follow your meandering thoughts, waiting for you to get to the point, wears out your listener and assures they will tune you out and just pretend to be listening.  A tell-tale sign that you are inserting too many inconsequential details into your speaking is if you regularly interrupt yourself with “Well, anyway….” Or “Long story short….”  My favorite reminder to stick to the point comes from my friend and mentor Leslie Zann, a talented speaker and ace trainer for the network marketing/direct sales industry.  Leslie always teaches, “If it’s not necessary to say, it’s necessary NOT to say it.”

I hope these communication tips will help you to create relationships built on mutual trust, honesty and respect. Those are bonds that last and will bring you rich rewards!

*****************Give Yourself the Gift of Dreams Fulfilled *****************

To schedule a no-obligation, F*R*E*E* HOUR of phone coaching that will help you clarify your Big Goals and get into ACTION on making them a reality, please email me TODAY at caroll@practicalprosperitycoach.com.